Before this eight-month foray, Rabbi Ben Zona appeared in such as adventures as
CIRCUMSPECTION
IF THE FALAFEL LOOK LIKE GOLD, and
FAMILY PLOT.
I was really having fun getting them off-script but I think it lost its momentum and started to drag on a bit. I was still willing to give it a go - still might - but they didn't seem too keen.
I present Mr. Sam Coker and Mrs. Anne Jenkins. Roll 'em.
Sam Coker
August 22, 2009
From: Sam Coker (samcoker25@gmail.com)
FROM THE DESK OF SAM COKER Attn: Dr. Rabbi Ben Zona This is to inform you that you have the sum of 11.5 million dollars with this fund can from the MTN network this is a communication company that issue out over 100 million dollars to 10 lucky winners in the world which you are one of the beneficiary, bear this in mind that it happened 3 years ago which we have been sending you email for you too come and claim your fund but you ignored us i don't know why. (This might actually be true - there are just so many to keep track of sometimes. I also have been addressed by name, though with scammers sharing details with each other it doesn't necessarily mean anything.) Last two years some one stole your information from our data base in our company after they know you have the sum of $11,500,000.00 United State Dollars they made you believe that they are the only one that can transfer the fund to you, we know they have been colleting money from you telling one or two liars given you hope that they trying their best to transfer the fund from you. I want you to know that we have caught some of them but some are still contacting you the only that will stop is if you stop every email of transfer that is coming Central Bank of Nigeria that is the only way can stop them. Now some one came to how bank to inform us that you have been receiving all the email we have been sending to you but due to your position at hand and you believe that is a scam you don't want to reply the email that is why you sent him to come and claim the fund as a compensation of what he has done for you this person's name is Jerome Lewis he is from United State Of America. We are sending this last email after this email we are not going to send you any more email about this fund because right now we are ready to transfer the fund to him because my boss told me that if you did not reply this email within 48 hours we are going to transfer the fund to him, if you want me to send you is international passport for you to confirm if you know him or not i am going to send it to you. For your information in case you are ready to claim the fund we have all your information that we need to transfer the fund but you need to send us your information again for yours to be sure that you are the one who is replying this email that is if you still want the fund to be transfer to you be rest assured that this is no scam. That is all for now and please do not reply all the email you see in your email address by that way you are helping us to fight scam in Nigeria. Await your responds Yours faithfully
Mr Sam Coker Rabbi Ben Zona
August 22, 2009
Dear Mr. Coker, You must be mistaken. I've never received an email from you, and I know nothing about money at the Central Bank of Nigeria. I've had many dealings with West Africa but I'm sure I'd remember that I'd have $11.5M lying around somewhere, though with my millions lying in offshore accounts none of this really surprises me. What is this MTN network? Are they known by another name?
Sincerely, Sam Coker
August 22, 2009
Attn: Dr. Rabbi Ben Zona First if you want your fund been transfer to you via online banking system please get back to us state with this code ( TRANSFER FUND VIA ONLINE BANKING CODE 012) as your subject when replying this email. Second if you want your fund been transfer to you via our own diplomatic system please get back to us state with this code ( TRANSFER FUND VIA DIPLOMATIC SYSTEM CODE 013) as your subject when replying this email. That is all for now and please do not reply all the email you see in your email address by that way you are helping us to fight scam in Nigeria.
Await your responds
Yours faithfully Rabbi Ben Zona
August 24, 2009
Dear Mr. Coker, Can you please refresh my memory with the information I've given you? Or at the very least show me my bank statement? What does this mean: That is all for now and please do not reply all the email you see in your email address by that way you are helping us to fight scam in Nigeria. It's funny that you mention me helping you fight scams in Nigeria. I'm not sure what this has to do with my $11.5M at hand, though. I have a barrister in Nigeria named Owata Dikedjua who is also fighting scams, and has the track record to prove it. I've sent him over $24,000US to release a secondary fund, which he assures me is on my way in the next day or two. You can reach him at xxx@xxx.com and ask him yourself.
Sincerely, Sam Coker
August 24, 2009
Attn: Dr. Rabbi Ben Zona Those are the people that stole your date from us and they us it to tell you that you have some money with them they went to transfer to you, all do if that can of must be transfer outside money country you have to pay some money but not up to that amount which is $24,000 US the highest you will use in making that kind of transfer is not more then $3000 US and the money will refunded back to you. Look I am not trying to pull your legs here or making a fool of you but this $11,500,000.00 US that is with us belongs to you, if you really want to get your fund get back to us with a reason answer. Has for the your dates that is with us I can not send it to via email because I am afraid of hackers just have it mind that we have confirm that you are really owner of the fund. Once more if you want this fund to be transfer to you get back to me with this code (012) so I will know you want your fund to be transferred via online. That is all for now and please do not reply all the email you see in your email address by that way you are helping us to fight scam in Nigeria.
Await your responds Sam Coker
(and then, 18 minutes later)
Attn: Dr. Rabbi Ben Zona
This is to inform you that if the lawyer is real let give you is website for you to see for self. Await your responds Yours faithfully Mr Sam Coker Rabbi Ben Zona
August 27, 2009
Hello, Mr. Coker, Of course he's real, don't be ridiculous. I've paid him thousands of dollars, but he's helping me with some key documents to make me a bit richer. He told me that his website is under construction for security purpose. Sincerely, Dr. Rabbi Ben Zona Congregation Patsch Intuchas Sam Coker
August 27, 2009
Attn: Dr. Rabbi Ben Zona And before we can do any transfer with that account it has to be re-activated and that is why we ask you to pay $250 dollars to activate the account before any transfer will be done. If you pay the $250 dollars it will be added to the $11,500,000.00 dollars that you have with us so the total money that will transfer to you is $11,500,250.00 dollars. This is the information you will use in making the payment.
Receiver's Name: Charles Chedom I want you once you make the payment and get back to us with the MTCN number for easy pick up, we will activate your account with in 24 hours and we will give you our website with a user name and password for you to transfer your fund from our bank. That is all for now and please do not reply all the email you see in your email address by that way you are helping us to fight scam in Nigeria.
Await your responds Rabbi Ben Zona
August 30, 2009
Dear Sam, Why don't you foot that bill and take it out of my $11,500,000.00 dollars? Better yet, you pay it yourself in person, and I'll write you a cheque for 10 times the amount.
Sincerely, Sam Coker
September 2, 2009
Attn: Dr. Rabbi Ben Zona This is to inform you that we can not do that at all if I have the money to pay for it I would have paid the money. Please kindly get back to me with all your information because I want to process some thing in your account to know if you can make the transfer with out paying any money. That is all for now and please do not reply all the email you see in your email address by that way you are helping us to fight scam in Nigeria.
Await your responds Rabbi Ben Zona
September 3, 2009
You're a bank, right? You can't shell out $250? I'm happy to wait for your next payday if you're a bit short.
Sincerely, Mrs. Annette E. Jenkins
(but then, someone else comes out of the woodwork, with an opening gambit I've seen many many times)
September 5, 2009
From: Mrs. Annette E. Jenkins (mrs.annejenkins@gmail.com) Hello Dr. Rabbi Ben Zona, I am Mrs. Annette E. Jenkins, I am a US citizen, 48 years Old. I reside in District of Columbia 20534. My residential address is as follows 320 First Street, NW Washington, District of Columbia 20534, United States, am thinking of moving since I am now wealthy. I am one of those that took part in the Compensation in Nigeria many years ago and they refused to pay me, I had paid over $42,000 while in the US, trying to get my payment all to no avail. So I decided to travel down to Nigeria with all my compensation documents, And I was directed to meet Mr. Sam Coker, who is the member of Central Bank Of Nigeria and a Head of Transfer Department, and I contacted him and he explained everything to me. He said whoever is contacting us through emails are fake. He took me to the Governor of Central Bank of Nigeria. Right now I am the most happiest woman on earth because I have received my compensation funds amounteing to $15,000,000.00 Moreover,Mr. Sam Coker, showed me the full information of those that are yet to receive their payments and I saw your email as one of the scam victims, that is why I decided to email you to stop dealing with those people, they are not with your fund, they are only making money out of you. I will advise you to contact Mr. Sam Coker You have to contact him directly on this information below.
COMPENSATION AWARD HOUSE You really have to stop dealing with those people that are contacting you and telling you that your fund is with them, it is not in anyway with them, they are only taking advantage of you and they will dry you up until you have nothing. The only money I paid after I meet Mr. Sam Coker was just $580 for the paper works, take note of that. Thank You and Be Blessed.
Mrs. Annette E. Jenkins [The story of ATTILA THE LAD opens almost exactly this way.] Rabbi Ben Zona
September 7, 2009
Dear Mrs. Jenkins, Why didn't Mr. Coker take care of the payment himself and you just pay him back later on?
Sincerely, Mrs. Annette E. Jenkins
September 7, 2009
Hello Dr. Rabbi Ben Zona, The reason why I pay that money is because they have to re-activate the account Mr. Coker can pay the money for because I am the owner of the account that is why I paid that money The only money I paid after I meet Mr. Sam Coker was just $580 for the paper works, take note of that.
Thank You and Be Blessed. Rabbi Ben Zona
September 8, 2009
Hello, Mrs. Jenkins! Thank you for writing back. I also haven't seen any proof that this money actually exists, nor do I remember specifically working on a contract in West Africa, nor remember ever visiting the country in the first place. Do you think this would pose a problem, or am I needlessly worrying?
Sincerely, Mrs. Annette E. Jenkins
September 8, 2009
I will like you to know that every thing you said is true if you do not see what you are paying them you will have that believe that it is a scam that was the same feeling I have before until I meet Mr. Coker and he was the person that made it clear to me that you donŐt have believe some before you can know it is the truth all you have to do is to follow your mind. I want you to know that Mr. Coker is a real person and not fake.Rabbi Ben Zona
September 8, 2009
Are you saying then that I should go and meet him before I pay anything? Mrs. Annette E. Jenkins
September 8, 2009
If you can go and see him before you pay the do that but if you have better things to do then pay the money to him via western union because I contact him this morning on be half of you and he told me that your money is still with that you have to get back to on how you will make the payment, so I will advice you to get back via email or telephone to know what you will do about your money because it is really and not a joke I have seen it for my self . have it at the back of your mind the only money I paid to then is only $580 dollars. Rabbi Ben Zona
September 10, 2009
Mrs. Jenkins,
Sincerely, Mrs. Annette E. Jenkins
September 10, 2009
Get back to me with the full information you want to offer me and the details because i am looking for a company to invest my money on...........................get back to if you really mean ir. A.J Rabbi Ben Zona
September 13, 2009
Mrs. Jenkins,
Sincerely, Rabbi Ben Zona
September 13, 2009
To: Sam Coker
Dear Mr. Coker, The reason I'm asking is that I need a job reference. She has applied to work as my personal assistant, and I'd need a character reference. Would you mind at all providing me with some feedback?
Sincerely, Mrs. Annette E. Jenkins
September 13, 2009
i am in for it hw much will u pay me 4 a start nw let me knw....get back to me Rabbi Ben Zona
September 14, 2009
Mrs. Jenkins, Shortcuts will not do at all when working for me. Compose for me a proper English message. I will make an offer based on your response.
Sincerely, Sam Coker
September 15, 2009
Attn: Dr. Rabbi Ben Zona She is a very nice woman the little time I spend with I have notice that she is a very nice person I believe she will be of a help to you. As for you fund what is going on you donŐt want to claim you fund any more. I have told that we can not deduct the money you are suppose from the fund and the owner of the fund is the only person that can pay money inside the account that is why I ask you to go and look for money so that you can transfer your fund. That is all for now and please do not reply all the email you see in your email address by that way you are helping us to fight scam in Nigeria.
Await your responds (I'm fairly sure that these two are two different people. Different fonts and sizes, etc. Different mangling of the English language. But you never know.) Rabbi Ben Zona
September 21, 2009
Mr. Coker,
Sincerely, Rabbi Ben Zona
(thought I'd try one last kick at the can)
October 7, 2009
Mrs. Jennings,
Sincerely, Mrs. Annette E. Jenkins
October 9, 2009
Dear Dr. Rabbi Ben Zona Get back to me with all what i have ask about. Mrs Anne Jenkins. Rabbi Ben Zona
October 11, 2009
Mrs Jenkins, I pay very competitive wages, but I would like you tell me first what you had in mind. If it is a fair price, I will see if I can match it. Though I wonder, with your newfound wealth as a result of our fine Mr. Sam Coker, what leads me to believe you still need to work as a personal assistant?
Sincerely, Mrs. Annette E. Jenkins
October 11, 2009
Dear Dr. Rabbi Ben Zona If you pay very competitive wage then i have no problem to worry about but i will like to know your country and your company location, what i will like you to pay monthly is $1,500 Dollars but you can not pay that let me know now. Get back to me with all what i have ask about. Mrs Anne Jenkins. ($1,500/month? Obviously she seems to have forgotten she's a multimillionaire...) Rabbi Ben Zona
October 14, 2009
Mrs. Jenkins, It's merely a technicality of course, as I like the cut of your jib.
Sincerely, Mrs. Annette E. Jenkins
October 14, 2009
Dear Dr. Rabbi Ben Zona Mrs Anne Jenkins (she attached the form with one page filled out)Rabbi Ben Zona
October 15, 2009
Dear Mrs. Jenkins, Incidentally, the board of directors will never accept your job application. Why, you've only filled out half the form! I suggest you have another bash at it. When it's through, we'll send out the other stuff you need to give us, banking information, that kind of thing. We are located in Kfar Bamba, Israel, a small village in the north of the country, outside of Kiryat Zevel just beyond Kibbutz Shiksa.
Sincerely, Rabbi Ben Zona
October 20, 2009
Mrs. Jenkins, How are you getting on with that job application?
Sincerely, Mrs. Annette E. Jenkins
October 22, 2009
Dear Ben Zona Rabbi Ben Zona
October 24, 2009
Mrs. Jenkins,
1. You are a millionaire a few times over and you want us to spot you $500. I suggest you at least complete the job application before asking the board to release any funds. Incidentally, the position pays about $2,000 per month, so you might also want to go back and revise your salary expectations.
Sincerely, Mrs. Annette E. Jenkins
October 24, 2009
Dear Ben Zona Second can not send some of my information over the internet i prefer i come to your country and give it to you with my hand not to send it via email. Mrs. Anne Jenkins,Rabbi Ben Zona
October 25, 2009
Mrs. Jenkins, I'm starting to reconsider my offer. Remind me what it was that had me interested in your experience in the first place.
Sincerely, Rabbi Ben Zona
November 10, 2009
Mrs. Jenkins,
Sincerely, Mrs. Annette E. Jenkins
November 11, 2009
Dear Ben Zona Rabbi Ben Zona
November 12, 2009
Mrs. Jenkins, Take this on good authority - we reward our employees well. The congregation before has been known to supply first-class tickets. The ball is in your court.
Sincerely, Mrs. Annette E. Jenkins
November 12, 2009
Dear Ben Zona Rabbi Ben Zona
November 16, 2009
Mrs. Jenkins,
Sincerely, Mrs. Annette E. Jenkins
November 17, 2009
Dear Ben Zona Rabbi Ben Zona
November 18, 2009
Excellent. I eagerly await your email. Sincerely, Dr. Rabbi Ben Zona Congregation Patsch Intuchas Rabbi Ben Zona
November 23, 2009
Mrs. Jenkins, Can I assist you in any way with the form? Sincerely, Dr. Rabbi Ben Zona Congregation Patsch Intuchas (and then leaving this for a while, another stab at it:) Rabbi Ben Zona
December 28, 2009
To: Sam Coker Mr. Coker, Are you still willing to stand by your reference for this person? She seems the most unreliable. Sincerely, Dr. Rabbi Ben Zona Congregation Patsch Intuchas Mrs. Annette E. Jenkins
(and nearly a month later...)
January 21, 2010
Dear Ben Zona I am sorry for delay of my email, i have been very sick is the work still available for me. Mrs. Anne Jenkins, Rabbi Ben Zona
January 24, 2010
Mrs. Jenkins, There is work, but the original position is no longer available. I have hired a personal assistant, Mrs. Mimi Pontipine, who has proven herself quite adept at handling Patsch Intuchas. As I maintained previously, the board will not entertain any employment without the proper form being filled out. I believe you sent the form to me half completed; we would appreciate the rest of it completed.
Sincerely, (At this point I was going to knock together some health insurance forms, but if she didn't fill in the simple job application form there was no way she's going to go through 10 pages of detailed medical history. Re Mimi Pontipine: Anyone with small children may get the reference.) Mrs. Annette E. Jenkins
January 24, 2010
Dear Ben Zona Rabbi Ben Zona
January 27, 2010
Mrs. Jenkins,
Sincerely, (Yes, I did give her a raise in hopes of getting the forms faster.) Mrs. Annette E. Jenkins
(...and success!)
February 9, 2010
Dear Ben Zona I told you before that in my next email that will be sending you the form, so please check the attachment below so you see it for your self. Mrs. Anne Jenkins (No obedience school is definitely a disadvantage. I require my employees to be obedient. And no friends? What a loser.) Rabbi Ben Zona
February 15, 2010
Dear Mrs. Jenkins, By the way, what were you ill with? I'm sure not only the board but also customs would be concerned with our sponsoring of a lady with some crazy disease like kwashiorkor or schistosomiasis.
Sincerely, Mrs. Annette E. Jenkins
February 19, 2010
Dear Ben Zona I will be waiting for your reply when you are finish with the board meeting Mrs. Anne JenkinsRabbi Ben Zona
March 1, 2010
Dear Mrs. Jenkins, I'll make sure that Mimi Pontipine gets you the insurance forms and we can get started with the visa application. Looking forward to meeting you.
Sincerely, Mrs. Annette E. Jenkins
March 4, 2010
Dear Ben Zona Rabbi Ben Zona
March 10, 2010
Mrs. Jenkins,
Sincerely, (I never sent her any forms.) Mimi Pontipine
March 10, 2010
From: Mimi Pontipine
Anne, Mrs. Annette E. Jenkins
March 10, 2010
Dear Ben Zona Thanks for your email, i will like you to know i have an international diplomatic passport i can go were in the world i believe i have told you before that all i need is $500 dollars to pay my flight ticket from Nigeria to your country and you promise me that if i fill out the form you make i have the money to come down to your country so i will resume work. Mrs. Anne Jenkins Rabbi Ben Zona
(then a month-long break from scambaiting ensued...)
April 25, 2010
Mrs. Jenkins, Afraid to tell you this, but we've got a hiring freeze at the moment. The board isn't looking to add any new characters this side of Shavuot. Unless of course, you want the job badly enough... Sincerely, Dr. Rabbi Ben Zona Congregation Patsch Intuchas [Thus it ended - Anne Jenkins blew a chance on a great job!] |