Aiman Daniels
IP: 78.138.0.202 (Lagos, Nigeria)
Dear Rabbi,
l am donating the sum of $1million to you Rabbi as my Vow that l made with my late father who was a Rabbi in the 80's. l need your prayers and blessings to help us in this Financial meltdown.My father always instruct us to give to Rabbi to receive Gods blessing upon anything we do. We are contesting a contract of a refinery repair in Saudi Arabia and we need your prayers. The $1million will be transferred into your account from a UK Bank. l need your phone number and address to enable me instruct the Bank to effect the transfer into your account immediately. Keep it secret until you have received the $1million into your account in few days.
Aiman Daniels
Ashland Oil and Gas Venezuela
l am donating the sum of $1million to you Rabbi as my Vow that l made with my late father who was a Rabbi in the 80's. l need your prayers and blessings to help us in this Financial meltdown.My father always instruct us to give to Rabbi to receive Gods blessing upon anything we do. We are contesting a contract of a refinery repair in Saudi Arabia and we need your prayers. The $1million will be transferred into your account from a UK Bank. l need your phone number and address to enable me instruct the Bank to effect the transfer into your account immediately. Keep it secret until you have received the $1million into your account in few days.
Aiman Daniels
Ashland Oil and Gas Venezuela
Rabbi Ben Zona
B"H
My Dear Mr. Daniels,
My secretary passed your message along. What a complete shock and utmost pleasant surprise to hear of this most amazing opportunity for myself and the congregation! $1 million could certainly go a long way toward building our new saltwater mikvah. We've got the mikvah built, but extracting the saltwater from the farmed crocodiles is the expensive bit.
Out of all the rabbis in the world, how on earth did you come to choose me, a lowly rabbi in Kiryat Bamba?
Waiting in great anticipation.
Yours sincerely,
Dr. Rabbi Ben Zona
Kehillas Baal Tashchis
My Dear Mr. Daniels,
My secretary passed your message along. What a complete shock and utmost pleasant surprise to hear of this most amazing opportunity for myself and the congregation! $1 million could certainly go a long way toward building our new saltwater mikvah. We've got the mikvah built, but extracting the saltwater from the farmed crocodiles is the expensive bit.
Out of all the rabbis in the world, how on earth did you come to choose me, a lowly rabbi in Kiryat Bamba?
Waiting in great anticipation.
Yours sincerely,
Dr. Rabbi Ben Zona
Kehillas Baal Tashchis
("Ben Zona" is Hebrew for "son of a prostitute" and is alternately a profanity and slang for something really really great.)
Aiman Daniels
Dear Rabbi,
The Bible said that "WHEN GOD TURNED THE CAPTIVITY OF THEM IN SION,THEY WERE LIKE THEM THAT DREAM FOR THEIR MOUTH WAS FILLED WITH LAUGHTER." When God wants to bless you.lt does not matter whether you are small or Big.or you are living in the local area.
Sir,
You are God special people and wants the best for you. Do not think you are small before God. lf you accept to receive these money $1million.You have to send me your phone number and Address so that l can instruct the UK Bank to transfer the money into your account latest friday this week. You will have to call them and verify everything l have told you. All you have to do is to follow the instructions the bank account officer ask you to do to get the transfer done into your account. Just Keep it secret until you have received the $1million into your account by friday or monday.
l will be expecting your mail with your personal datas.
Aiman Daniels
The Bible said that "WHEN GOD TURNED THE CAPTIVITY OF THEM IN SION,THEY WERE LIKE THEM THAT DREAM FOR THEIR MOUTH WAS FILLED WITH LAUGHTER." When God wants to bless you.lt does not matter whether you are small or Big.or you are living in the local area.
Sir,
You are God special people and wants the best for you. Do not think you are small before God. lf you accept to receive these money $1million.You have to send me your phone number and Address so that l can instruct the UK Bank to transfer the money into your account latest friday this week. You will have to call them and verify everything l have told you. All you have to do is to follow the instructions the bank account officer ask you to do to get the transfer done into your account. Just Keep it secret until you have received the $1million into your account by friday or monday.
l will be expecting your mail with your personal datas.
Aiman Daniels
Aiman Daniels
Dear Rabbi,
l have not heard from you.
l am expecting your mail.
Aiman
l have not heard from you.
l am expecting your mail.
Aiman
Rabbi Ben Zona
(responding to his first message)
B"H
Dear Mr. Daniels,
A fine quote from Tehillim, and one that should make us all feel proud to be Jewish. If you could tell me your father's special rabbinical name, I will make a special benediction this Shabbat in his honour. If you don't know it, it's the one that was the one that's been tattooed on our foreskins for security purpose. It should be listed in the levaya documentation, just after beard length. Tell me, what hashkafah was your father? Was his congregation Quaker, Episcopalian, or Branch Davidian?
I'd love to follow the bank's instructions, but they haven't sent any.
Sincerely,
Dr. Rabbi Ben Zona
Congregation Baal Tashchis
Dear Mr. Daniels,
A fine quote from Tehillim, and one that should make us all feel proud to be Jewish. If you could tell me your father's special rabbinical name, I will make a special benediction this Shabbat in his honour. If you don't know it, it's the one that was the one that's been tattooed on our foreskins for security purpose. It should be listed in the levaya documentation, just after beard length. Tell me, what hashkafah was your father? Was his congregation Quaker, Episcopalian, or Branch Davidian?
I'd love to follow the bank's instructions, but they haven't sent any.
Sincerely,
Dr. Rabbi Ben Zona
Congregation Baal Tashchis
("Tehillim" = Book of Psalms. While I'm at it, "Baal Tashchis" = a Talmudic term for being unnecessarily wasteful, "levaya" = funeral, "hashkafah" = religious bent)
Rabbi Ben Zona
(responding to the next one)
Dear Aiman,
From Proverbs 14:29: "Patience results in much understanding; impatience gets folly as its portion." With my reputation, do you really expect me to forget about an opportunity that's seemingly too good to be true? As it happens I cannot write every day, as access to the computer is a constant challenge with 17 children still living at home with us.
Sincerely,
Dr. Rabbi Ben Zona
Congregation Baal Tashchis
From Proverbs 14:29: "Patience results in much understanding; impatience gets folly as its portion." With my reputation, do you really expect me to forget about an opportunity that's seemingly too good to be true? As it happens I cannot write every day, as access to the computer is a constant challenge with 17 children still living at home with us.
Sincerely,
Dr. Rabbi Ben Zona
Congregation Baal Tashchis
Aiman Daniels
(in response to my first email)
Subject: Contact the Finance Coperation
Dear Rabbi
l have informed the UK Bank already to start the transfer into your account.You can send your residential address and Phone number to the UK Bank and the Finance Company when contacted.
This is the information of the Financial Institution that will transfer the $1million into your account from the UK Bank in few days.
They will have to process the documents neccessary to transfer the funds $1million into your account in few days.
Just follow their instructions so that they can effectively do the transfer into your account latest Tuesday next week.
British Financial Laws is quite different from your country Financial Laws.That is why l ask you to follow the account officer's guidelines.
Call the account officer as soon as you get this mail or send them an emai. Name ; Oversea Credit Commission Uk Tel;+ 44-7045710128. Email: overseacreditcommissionuk@banha.cc Contact Person;Mr Greg Harrison. Tell Mr Greg that you are the Beneficiary of the $1million that Aiman Daniels instructed him to transfer immediately.
l have already instructed Mr Greg to hasten the transfer into your account immediately. Mr Greg Will send you all the details from the UK Bank.
Aiman Daniels
Dear Rabbi
l have informed the UK Bank already to start the transfer into your account.You can send your residential address and Phone number to the UK Bank and the Finance Company when contacted.
This is the information of the Financial Institution that will transfer the $1million into your account from the UK Bank in few days.
They will have to process the documents neccessary to transfer the funds $1million into your account in few days.
Just follow their instructions so that they can effectively do the transfer into your account latest Tuesday next week.
British Financial Laws is quite different from your country Financial Laws.That is why l ask you to follow the account officer's guidelines.
Call the account officer as soon as you get this mail or send them an emai. Name ; Oversea Credit Commission Uk Tel;+ 44-7045710128. Email: overseacreditcommissionuk@banha.cc Contact Person;Mr Greg Harrison. Tell Mr Greg that you are the Beneficiary of the $1million that Aiman Daniels instructed him to transfer immediately.
l have already instructed Mr Greg to hasten the transfer into your account immediately. Mr Greg Will send you all the details from the UK Bank.
Aiman Daniels
[Standard Lad S.O.P. = First Contact Lad passes potential victim (in Lad-speak, "maga" or "mugu") on to "Banker" Lad and as many other Lads as needed to close the deal, the loot (in Lad-speak, "sharing percentage") being split various ways.]
Aiman Daniels
(in response to my second one)
Dear Rabbi,
When God is ready to Bless you.lt comes as a surprise.
But you are a Blessed people to God.
You are God's special people and it should not surprise you when God sends his Blessing this way.
l will send you all the neccessary details of my father when l return including his pictures.
l am currently in Saudi Arabia.
Contact the Financial Coperation to start the transfer of the $1million immediately.
Thanks
Aiman Daniels
When God is ready to Bless you.lt comes as a surprise.
But you are a Blessed people to God.
You are God's special people and it should not surprise you when God sends his Blessing this way.
l will send you all the neccessary details of my father when l return including his pictures.
l am currently in Saudi Arabia.
Contact the Financial Coperation to start the transfer of the $1million immediately.
Thanks
Aiman Daniels
Mr Greg Harrison
IP: 195.216.245.10 (Lagos, Nigeria)
From: Oversea Credit Commission <overseacreditcommissionuk@banha.cc>
Subject: Ref: Payment of US$1,000,000.00 as Approved
Attention Dr. Rabbi Ben Zona
Sir,
This is to confirm the receipt of the debit advise and credit instruction from Aiman Daniel, for the payment of US$1,000,000.00 to you.
The above stated fund will be paid to you by telegraphic transfer (TT) through this commission crediting bank here in London immediately all official banking formalities are accomplished.
You are required to forward the following details to this commission to enable us commence the wire transfer approval procedure of the above fund to you.
Your full name & Address Your Bank Name & Address Acount Number, Routing Number, Swift code of your bank.
On receipt of the above stated details, this commission will obtain the wire transfer approval of the above fund and credit your account with the above stated sum.
Finally, It is very important you contact this commission through the telephone number stated below for further credit advise.
Treat as very important.
Thanks Yours Faithfully
Mr Greg Harrison
Credit Manager
Oversea Credit Commission Uk
Tel: + 44-70359-01612, + 44-70457 10128
Subject: Ref: Payment of US$1,000,000.00 as Approved
Attention Dr. Rabbi Ben Zona
Sir,
This is to confirm the receipt of the debit advise and credit instruction from Aiman Daniel, for the payment of US$1,000,000.00 to you.
The above stated fund will be paid to you by telegraphic transfer (TT) through this commission crediting bank here in London immediately all official banking formalities are accomplished.
You are required to forward the following details to this commission to enable us commence the wire transfer approval procedure of the above fund to you.
Your full name & Address Your Bank Name & Address Acount Number, Routing Number, Swift code of your bank.
On receipt of the above stated details, this commission will obtain the wire transfer approval of the above fund and credit your account with the above stated sum.
Finally, It is very important you contact this commission through the telephone number stated below for further credit advise.
Treat as very important.
Thanks Yours Faithfully
Mr Greg Harrison
Credit Manager
Oversea Credit Commission Uk
Tel: + 44-70359-01612, + 44-70457 10128
[Looks like UK cellphone; scammer may well be there; or the number may forward elsewhere.]
Rabbi Ben Zona
B"H
Dear Aiman,
How do they let the son of a rabbi into Saudi Arabia to begin with? Sincerely,
Dr. Rabbi Ben Zona
Congregation Baal Tashchis
Dear Aiman,
How do they let the son of a rabbi into Saudi Arabia to begin with? Sincerely,
Dr. Rabbi Ben Zona
Congregation Baal Tashchis
(Israelis or Jews aren't allowed into Saudi Arabia.)
Rabbi Ben Zona
(and to the bank:)
Mr. Harrison,
Just so you know I hold all banks and bankers in very high disdain. Before I hand over my personal details, which bank are you from? The Oversea [sic] Credit Commission is not a bank as far as I'm aware. What say you?
And I don't phone UK mobile numbers on principle. Bezeq charges an arm and a leg for local mobiles, so I can't begin to imagine what they'd charge for an oversea [sic] call.
You must excuse me, I have a terrible case of the siccups [sic].
Dr. Rabbi Ben Zona
Congregation Baal Tashchis
Just so you know I hold all banks and bankers in very high disdain. Before I hand over my personal details, which bank are you from? The Oversea [sic] Credit Commission is not a bank as far as I'm aware. What say you?
And I don't phone UK mobile numbers on principle. Bezeq charges an arm and a leg for local mobiles, so I can't begin to imagine what they'd charge for an oversea [sic] call.
You must excuse me, I have a terrible case of the siccups [sic].
Dr. Rabbi Ben Zona
Congregation Baal Tashchis
(Bezeq = Israeli phone company)
Rabbi Ben Zona
B"H
My Dear Aiman,
Before the modalities begin, I would think some recognition of your father is in order. How can I proceed if I don't know his hashkafah or his special rabbinical name? And I have already contacted Mr. Greg, though I'm not sure what kind of bank calls itself the "Oversea Credit Commission UK". I've never heard of it. Where does your family live in Israel? Are they close to Kiryat Bamba or are they further away, closer to Alo Agala?
Sincerely,
Dr. Rabbi Ben Zona
Congregation Baal Tashchis
My Dear Aiman,
Before the modalities begin, I would think some recognition of your father is in order. How can I proceed if I don't know his hashkafah or his special rabbinical name? And I have already contacted Mr. Greg, though I'm not sure what kind of bank calls itself the "Oversea Credit Commission UK". I've never heard of it. Where does your family live in Israel? Are they close to Kiryat Bamba or are they further away, closer to Alo Agala?
Sincerely,
Dr. Rabbi Ben Zona
Congregation Baal Tashchis
("Alo Agala" = what they scream in Israeli markets at you to get out of the way because they're pushing a wagon full of produce)
Mr Greg Harrison
Attention Ben Zona
Sir,
Your mail is received and noted. Oversea Credit Commission is a finance Organisation that is a fudiciary Agent to Barclays Bank Plc, HSBC Bank, Halifax Bank and other financial institution's here in London.
Your fund will be paid to you by telegraphic transfer (TT), through this Commission Paying Bank Barclays Bank here in London immediately all Official Banking Formalities are accomplished.
Should you want to receive this payment as Approved for Credit to you, you comply by sending the required details as instructed.
Thanks
Yours Faithfully
Mr Greg Harrison
Credit Manager
Oversea Credit Commission Uk
Tel: + 44-70359-01612
Sir,
Your mail is received and noted. Oversea Credit Commission is a finance Organisation that is a fudiciary Agent to Barclays Bank Plc, HSBC Bank, Halifax Bank and other financial institution's here in London.
Your fund will be paid to you by telegraphic transfer (TT), through this Commission Paying Bank Barclays Bank here in London immediately all Official Banking Formalities are accomplished.
Should you want to receive this payment as Approved for Credit to you, you comply by sending the required details as instructed.
Thanks
Yours Faithfully
Mr Greg Harrison
Credit Manager
Oversea Credit Commission Uk
Tel: + 44-70359-01612
Aiman Daniels
Dear Rabbi Ben,
l am not a Rabbi and my international Passport does not state l am a Rabbi son or related to a Rabbi.
My late father was a Rabbi.
l dont have a long beard.
l can send you my picture if you want.
Are you contact with the Transfer officer Mr Greg to your account?
Tell him to hasten the transfer processes.
Aiman
l am not a Rabbi and my international Passport does not state l am a Rabbi son or related to a Rabbi.
My late father was a Rabbi.
l dont have a long beard.
l can send you my picture if you want.
Are you contact with the Transfer officer Mr Greg to your account?
Tell him to hasten the transfer processes.
Aiman
Aiman Daniels
Subject: Dont
Rabbi,
Dont indulge in anything you dont believe in.
l am not begging you to receive the $1million.
ln as much as you God's special people.Children are also God special people and so it will be better if l send the donation to Charity organizations.
l did not call Oversea Credit Commission UK a Bank.
lt is a Financial Institution that helps to do do your transfer speedily into your account via their affiliated Banks.
They live on Bank commissions.
Aiman
Rabbi,
Dont indulge in anything you dont believe in.
l am not begging you to receive the $1million.
ln as much as you God's special people.Children are also God special people and so it will be better if l send the donation to Charity organizations.
l did not call Oversea Credit Commission UK a Bank.
lt is a Financial Institution that helps to do do your transfer speedily into your account via their affiliated Banks.
They live on Bank commissions.
Aiman
Rabbi Ben Zona
Mr. Harrison,
Sincerely,
Dr. Rabbi Ben Zona
Congregation Baal Tashchis
"Your fund will be paid to you by telegraphic transfer (TT), through this Commission Paying Bank Barclays Bank here in London immediately all Official Banking Formalities are accomplished."
Explain yourself. Seriously. I have no idea what this means. Is English your native tongue, or are you from oversea?Sincerely,
Dr. Rabbi Ben Zona
Congregation Baal Tashchis
Rabbi Ben Zona
Dear Aiman,
Don't be daft. Passports don't state your profession nor your parents' professions. They don't let yidden into Saudi Arabia. How'd you get in? And why are you staying? And you still haven't told me anything about your father. You've introduced an intriguing character into these modalities, and I know nothing about him, his hashkafah, his secret rabbinical name, where his congregation was, how much blood he uses to make matza, that kind of thing. Can you give me a mini-biography?
Why also would you vow to donate $1M to a rabbi? This is what I can't get my head around. I have been in contact with Mr. Greg, though I will write to him immediately to tell him to hasten the process.
Incidentally, you assured me that I would have received my money in my bank account last Friday. Sincerely,
Dr. Rabbi Ben Zona
Congregation Baal Tashchis
Don't be daft. Passports don't state your profession nor your parents' professions. They don't let yidden into Saudi Arabia. How'd you get in? And why are you staying? And you still haven't told me anything about your father. You've introduced an intriguing character into these modalities, and I know nothing about him, his hashkafah, his secret rabbinical name, where his congregation was, how much blood he uses to make matza, that kind of thing. Can you give me a mini-biography?
Why also would you vow to donate $1M to a rabbi? This is what I can't get my head around. I have been in contact with Mr. Greg, though I will write to him immediately to tell him to hasten the process.
Incidentally, you assured me that I would have received my money in my bank account last Friday. Sincerely,
Dr. Rabbi Ben Zona
Congregation Baal Tashchis
Rabbi Ben Zona
(and to his second message)
B"H
Dear Aiman,
I am independently wealthy from my own successful investments - I created Kiryat Bamba myself, and Congregation Baal Tashchis as well - so I'm not begging to receive $1M. Of course, I'm always happy to receive it and give it to the congregation. I was planning to name our host desecration room after your father BUT I DON'T KNOW HIS NAME. If you don't want to give me the money, that's fine, it was nice knowing you. But yet I also feel I can't let you go - not yet. What you say makes for an interesting story, one that no doubt will fascinate the community once the facts come to light, none of which you've disclosed.
And yes, in your last message sent on 25 June, you referred to the Oversea Credit Commission as a bank 4 times. I'm very observant. Although that Mr. Greg Harrison seems to be a bit of a shady character. Also, if you're in Saudi Arabia, why don't you stop on by? I'd love to meet you. I don't know where in Saudi Arabia you are, but what you would do is you get a bus up to Sinai, a taxi into Gaza, and from there, some days there are nearly hourly flights into southern Israel.
Dr. Rabbi Ben Zona
Congregation Baal Tashchis
Dear Aiman,
I am independently wealthy from my own successful investments - I created Kiryat Bamba myself, and Congregation Baal Tashchis as well - so I'm not begging to receive $1M. Of course, I'm always happy to receive it and give it to the congregation. I was planning to name our host desecration room after your father BUT I DON'T KNOW HIS NAME. If you don't want to give me the money, that's fine, it was nice knowing you. But yet I also feel I can't let you go - not yet. What you say makes for an interesting story, one that no doubt will fascinate the community once the facts come to light, none of which you've disclosed.
And yes, in your last message sent on 25 June, you referred to the Oversea Credit Commission as a bank 4 times. I'm very observant. Although that Mr. Greg Harrison seems to be a bit of a shady character. Also, if you're in Saudi Arabia, why don't you stop on by? I'd love to meet you. I don't know where in Saudi Arabia you are, but what you would do is you get a bus up to Sinai, a taxi into Gaza, and from there, some days there are nearly hourly flights into southern Israel.
Dr. Rabbi Ben Zona
Congregation Baal Tashchis
Mr Greg Harrison
Attention Ben Zona
Sir,
Your mail is received and noted. You are advised to forward your bank account details for the payment of the above stated sum.
Stop asking question without bearing, you should comply with the directives as instructed.
Thanks
Yours Faithfully
Mr Greg Harrison
Credit Manager
Oversea Credit Commission Uk
Tel: + 44-70359-01612
Sir,
Your mail is received and noted. You are advised to forward your bank account details for the payment of the above stated sum.
Stop asking question without bearing, you should comply with the directives as instructed.
Thanks
Yours Faithfully
Mr Greg Harrison
Credit Manager
Oversea Credit Commission Uk
Tel: + 44-70359-01612
Aiman Daniels
[who sloppily starts signing off as "Engr Toua Flinn"]
Dear Rabbi,
l am very confused because l am having a little problems with certain documents l require for this contract and so many things going on in my head.
l have not asked Mr Greg Harrison not to give you the $1million.l was only upset with many things going on in my head.
Rabbi Ben,l need prayers to see me through this contract.
Whatever details you require l will send it to you when l get back to Leeds-UK
But now l just need you to pray for ASHLAND OIL AND GAS to get the contract from the Saudi Arabia Government .This is all l need.Just Prayers.
Today they are trying to link up the contract with an Arabian Oil firm in Dubai ZENON oils.
Mr Greg is a good man and lf l said Oversea Credit Commission UK is a Bank.then it is an error oversight.
My Father's name Yossi Avraham.My whole name is Toua Flinn Avraham.l schooled in Perth-Australia and that is where l got the name Flinn.
lt is a Financial institution that is affiliated with many UK and USA Banks on foreign transfers.They usually get their commission from this transfers.
l will be leaving Jeddah next week thursday.
. Can you give me guideline on how to meet you personally.so that l can know exactly when to Board the Bus to your destination.ls there no flight to Tel aviv?
l am a bit Fat.
You can go ahead and call Mr Greg to transfer the $1milion into your account this week.
We have alot to discuss when l meet you next week.
Engr Toua Flinn
l am very confused because l am having a little problems with certain documents l require for this contract and so many things going on in my head.
l have not asked Mr Greg Harrison not to give you the $1million.l was only upset with many things going on in my head.
Rabbi Ben,l need prayers to see me through this contract.
Whatever details you require l will send it to you when l get back to Leeds-UK
But now l just need you to pray for ASHLAND OIL AND GAS to get the contract from the Saudi Arabia Government .This is all l need.Just Prayers.
Today they are trying to link up the contract with an Arabian Oil firm in Dubai ZENON oils.
Mr Greg is a good man and lf l said Oversea Credit Commission UK is a Bank.then it is an error oversight.
My Father's name Yossi Avraham.My whole name is Toua Flinn Avraham.l schooled in Perth-Australia and that is where l got the name Flinn.
lt is a Financial institution that is affiliated with many UK and USA Banks on foreign transfers.They usually get their commission from this transfers.
l will be leaving Jeddah next week thursday.
. Can you give me guideline on how to meet you personally.so that l can know exactly when to Board the Bus to your destination.ls there no flight to Tel aviv?
l am a bit Fat.
You can go ahead and call Mr Greg to transfer the $1milion into your account this week.
We have alot to discuss when l meet you next week.
Engr Toua Flinn
(I've been asked where I get scambait ideas from. When I get lines like "l am a bit Fat", it can almost write itself.)
Aiman Daniels or ?
(short and sweet from Aiman, or maybe it's Engr Toua Flinn... who knows...)
Make sure you get the 1million into your account this week.
When l meet you next wee.l can answer your question and probably give you all the detaill needed
Thanks
When l meet you next wee.l can answer your question and probably give you all the detaill needed
Thanks
Rabbi Ben Zona
Mr. Harrison, I advise you to watch your tone.
My bank details are:
Bank Leumi, Kiryat Bamba Branch, Acct #4190142-09
Now transfer my money to me right now and never bother me again.
Dr. Rabbi Ben Zona
Congregation Baal Tashchis
My bank details are:
Bank Leumi, Kiryat Bamba Branch, Acct #4190142-09
Now transfer my money to me right now and never bother me again.
Dr. Rabbi Ben Zona
Congregation Baal Tashchis
Rabbi Ben Zona
to: Aiman or Toua Flinn or whoever Reb Toua,
Great to hear you're coming to visit! I'll have Chaya Mushka make the Shabbat preparations. You will stay with us, won't you? If you can get into Sinai, head over to the Dolphin Hotel in Dahab and ask for Nasser. He's a good friend of mine, and can arrange private transportation. Would you prefer a dromedary or a dual-humped ungulate? Better yet, if you can make it into Tel Aviv, take the bus to Karmiel and I'll pick you up from there. Kiryat Bamba's a short ride away.
This all depends of course on which passport are you travelling on. I can arrange the visa on my end. I can't make a Kel Maleh Rachamim in shul without your father's full name - you've only given me his first name. As you know, I'll need his complete maternal grandmother's name as well as the names of her closest two friends (this should also be in the levaya documentation as you're well aware) and the name of his congregation. The prayer is for your father, though, not for your company. We rabbis aren't supposed to pray for companies, though I could offer up 3 more virgins for the Sabbath fire-sacrifice. It might take a while as virgins are running low around Kiryat Bamba these days, ever since Uncle Nachman went to the hospital with his terrible gynaecomastia, the whole town's been praying for him. Look, I'll see what I could do, but no promises. Would Ashland settle for setting up a gas station? You only need to burn 1 virgin for a gas station.
Mr. Greg Harrison is a schmuck. What an awful, unprofessional individual we've been saddled with. He's rude, has bad manners, and is completely without credentials. I mean, who ever heard of a credit manager at a ficticious credit commission not even holding a doctorate? We have no problem with fat. Kiryat Bamba by its very name is quite high in fat. By fat, just for interest sake, are we talking a love handle or two, or are we talking Snuffleupagus?
Sincerely,
Dr. Rabbi Ben Zona
Congregation Baal Tashchis
Great to hear you're coming to visit! I'll have Chaya Mushka make the Shabbat preparations. You will stay with us, won't you? If you can get into Sinai, head over to the Dolphin Hotel in Dahab and ask for Nasser. He's a good friend of mine, and can arrange private transportation. Would you prefer a dromedary or a dual-humped ungulate? Better yet, if you can make it into Tel Aviv, take the bus to Karmiel and I'll pick you up from there. Kiryat Bamba's a short ride away.
This all depends of course on which passport are you travelling on. I can arrange the visa on my end. I can't make a Kel Maleh Rachamim in shul without your father's full name - you've only given me his first name. As you know, I'll need his complete maternal grandmother's name as well as the names of her closest two friends (this should also be in the levaya documentation as you're well aware) and the name of his congregation. The prayer is for your father, though, not for your company. We rabbis aren't supposed to pray for companies, though I could offer up 3 more virgins for the Sabbath fire-sacrifice. It might take a while as virgins are running low around Kiryat Bamba these days, ever since Uncle Nachman went to the hospital with his terrible gynaecomastia, the whole town's been praying for him. Look, I'll see what I could do, but no promises. Would Ashland settle for setting up a gas station? You only need to burn 1 virgin for a gas station.
Mr. Greg Harrison is a schmuck. What an awful, unprofessional individual we've been saddled with. He's rude, has bad manners, and is completely without credentials. I mean, who ever heard of a credit manager at a ficticious credit commission not even holding a doctorate? We have no problem with fat. Kiryat Bamba by its very name is quite high in fat. By fat, just for interest sake, are we talking a love handle or two, or are we talking Snuffleupagus?
Sincerely,
Dr. Rabbi Ben Zona
Congregation Baal Tashchis
[Aspiring scambaiters, take note: Rabbi Ben Zona is demonstrating the Spread Dissension technique. Insult the First Lad's "Banker" or "Barrister". Disrupting team morale may be easier if, as is often the case, the various Lads do not know each other personally or are not in the same country. If one Lad is playing all parts, and you manage to create dissension between his alter egos, you have really accomplished something. ]
Rabbi Ben Zona
B"H
My dear Aiman/Toua Flinn Avraham:
Kiryat Bamba is abuzz with excitement about your impending arrival on Friday. We would like to celebrate when you do come, in honour of your late father, Rabbi Yossi Avraham. What kind of wine do you this is appropriate? We have a lovely Chateau Katyusha '97 - a fine wine if you like a flavour explosion that just misses the mark. Or maybe you prefer a Cabernet Savigntifada, a taste that entices and incites? Or would he have prefered a stronger Dudu Topaz '09, brawny, lacking depth but packs a mean punch?
Sincerely,
Dr. Rabbi Ben Zona
Congregation Baal Tashchis
My dear Aiman/Toua Flinn Avraham:
Kiryat Bamba is abuzz with excitement about your impending arrival on Friday. We would like to celebrate when you do come, in honour of your late father, Rabbi Yossi Avraham. What kind of wine do you this is appropriate? We have a lovely Chateau Katyusha '97 - a fine wine if you like a flavour explosion that just misses the mark. Or maybe you prefer a Cabernet Savigntifada, a taste that entices and incites? Or would he have prefered a stronger Dudu Topaz '09, brawny, lacking depth but packs a mean punch?
Sincerely,
Dr. Rabbi Ben Zona
Congregation Baal Tashchis
Emily Jackson
[Entre Mlle. le nouveau scammer du jour.
IP: same one as Mr. Greg Harrison]
Subject: MIDI HOSPITAL DEAR Sir,
MR DANIELS IS HERE AFTER A FRACTURE HE SUFFERED IN AN AUTO CRASH SUNDAY HERE IN KUALA-LUMPUR. HE ASKED ME TO MAIL YOU.HE ASK IF YOU CAN COME TO VISIT HIM HERE. HIS CHEEKS WAS AFFECTED. PLEASE MAIL ME TO KEEP HIM INFORMED OF YOUR AWARENESS.
EMILY
MR DANIELS IS HERE AFTER A FRACTURE HE SUFFERED IN AN AUTO CRASH SUNDAY HERE IN KUALA-LUMPUR. HE ASKED ME TO MAIL YOU.HE ASK IF YOU CAN COME TO VISIT HIM HERE. HIS CHEEKS WAS AFFECTED. PLEASE MAIL ME TO KEEP HIM INFORMED OF YOUR AWARENESS.
EMILY
[HIS CHEEKS WAS AFFECTED: cf. "l am a bit Fat."]
Rabbi Ben Zona
B"H
Emily,
What tragic news! What was Mr. Daniels was doing in Malaysia? I told him to get to Gaza. I wonder at what point he realised he was on the wrong bus. I would have thought that at least at the Hindu Kush he might have been tipped off and caught another bus. Good for him for staying the course - I admire his temerity, if not his intelligence. Here I was in Kiryat Bamba busting my butt for him, and he was busy doing it in KL. I wouldn't mind hearing from him personally - tell him to stand while he types.
He should be well aware that I am unable to travel to Malaysia on an Israeli passport, so no, I cannot meet him there.
Who are you, if I may ask?
Sincerely,
Dr. Rabbi Ben Zona
Congregation Baal Tashchis
Emily,
What tragic news! What was Mr. Daniels was doing in Malaysia? I told him to get to Gaza. I wonder at what point he realised he was on the wrong bus. I would have thought that at least at the Hindu Kush he might have been tipped off and caught another bus. Good for him for staying the course - I admire his temerity, if not his intelligence. Here I was in Kiryat Bamba busting my butt for him, and he was busy doing it in KL. I wouldn't mind hearing from him personally - tell him to stand while he types.
He should be well aware that I am unable to travel to Malaysia on an Israeli passport, so no, I cannot meet him there.
Who are you, if I may ask?
Sincerely,
Dr. Rabbi Ben Zona
Congregation Baal Tashchis
Emily Jackson
Sir,
I AM NURSE ATTENDING TO HIM.I GOT HIS HP LAPTOP AND HE ASK ME TO RESPOND TO CERTAIN MAILS. MR DANIELS HAS BANDAGES ON HIS HANDS AS A RESULT OF THE BRUISES. HIS DOCTOR WILL ARRIVE FROM LONDON AT 11:45AM TO FLY HIM TO LONDON FOR PROPER MEDICAL CHECK-UP. MR DANIEL SAID IF YOU CAN COME TO KUALAR-LUMPUR OR MEET HIM IN MANCHESTER. MR DANIEL SAID IF HE CAN SEND YOU A BRITISH AIRLINE TICKET TO LONDON.?
I AM NURSE ATTENDING TO HIM.I GOT HIS HP LAPTOP AND HE ASK ME TO RESPOND TO CERTAIN MAILS. MR DANIELS HAS BANDAGES ON HIS HANDS AS A RESULT OF THE BRUISES. HIS DOCTOR WILL ARRIVE FROM LONDON AT 11:45AM TO FLY HIM TO LONDON FOR PROPER MEDICAL CHECK-UP. MR DANIEL SAID IF YOU CAN COME TO KUALAR-LUMPUR OR MEET HIM IN MANCHESTER. MR DANIEL SAID IF HE CAN SEND YOU A BRITISH AIRLINE TICKET TO LONDON.?
Rabbi Ben Zona
To: Emily Jackson, Aiman Daniels B"H
Nurse Jackson (Aiman take note),
If you're meant to respond to his emails, why are you responding from your personal account? I don't believe you're acting on his behalf, and I don't think I want to correspond with you.
Dr. Rabbi Ben Zona
Congregation Baal Tashchis
Nurse Jackson (Aiman take note),
If you're meant to respond to his emails, why are you responding from your personal account? I don't believe you're acting on his behalf, and I don't think I want to correspond with you.
Dr. Rabbi Ben Zona
Congregation Baal Tashchis
Aiman Daniels
[from Aiman Daniels' email address, IP actually traced to an Israeli satellite company known to provide connectivity to West Africa]
DEAR Sir,
I THOUGHT IT WILL BE BETTER IF I RESPOND WITH MY EMAILBOX.
HE WILL BE LEAVING MALAYSIA TODAY IN TWO HOURS TO LONDON.
BYE
I THOUGHT IT WILL BE BETTER IF I RESPOND WITH MY EMAILBOX.
HE WILL BE LEAVING MALAYSIA TODAY IN TWO HOURS TO LONDON.
BYE
Rabbi Ben Zona
Aiman,
If you get to read this, I suggest you change your email account and password.
Dr. Rabbi Ben Zona
Congregation Baal Tashchis
If you get to read this, I suggest you change your email account and password.
Dr. Rabbi Ben Zona
Congregation Baal Tashchis
Rabbi Ben Zona
Mr. Harrison,
I have been waiting for the transfer of this money for some time now. I believe I have not received it yet because you a worthless, incompetent little bureaucrat not worth your weight in guano.
Please confirm the above.
Dr. Rabbi Ben Zona
Congregation Baal Tashchis
I have been waiting for the transfer of this money for some time now. I believe I have not received it yet because you a worthless, incompetent little bureaucrat not worth your weight in guano.
Please confirm the above.
Dr. Rabbi Ben Zona
Congregation Baal Tashchis
Rabbi Ben Zona
B"H
Aiman, I gave you a misheberach in shul, and I do hope your health was not too adversely affected. Hearing that your cheeks have been affected was not news I could take sitting down. Nor could you I imagine - hope the flight from KL wasn't too bumpy. Are you still heading over to Israel? We had a nice cake ready for you. We'll put it in the freezer for you for when you come.
Sincerely,
Dr. Rabbi Ben Zona
Congregation Baal Tashchis
Aiman, I gave you a misheberach in shul, and I do hope your health was not too adversely affected. Hearing that your cheeks have been affected was not news I could take sitting down. Nor could you I imagine - hope the flight from KL wasn't too bumpy. Are you still heading over to Israel? We had a nice cake ready for you. We'll put it in the freezer for you for when you come.
Sincerely,
Dr. Rabbi Ben Zona
Congregation Baal Tashchis
