Scamorama was tickled to hear from the noted scam-baiter, Dr. Phil McCrackin.

Some people would become despondent upon receiving so many come-ons from thieves.
Not Dr. Phil! In this exchange he takes on (and apparently discourages) so many scammers that they don't get their own pretty colors.
Read on and be amazed by the Power of Dead Man's Cash ®!*

*All rights reserved Dr Phil McCrackin

From: JAMES KALAKU [SMTP:jk2002@themail.com]
Subject: HELLO

Dear Sir/Madam,
First, I must solicit your confidence in this transaction; this is by virtue of its nature as being utterly CONFIDENTIAL and TOP SECRET. Though I know that a transaction of this magnitude will make anyone apprehensive and worried, but I am assuring you that all will be well at the end of the day. We have decided to contact you due to the urgency of this transaction, as we have been reliably informed of your discreteness and ability in a transaction of this nature and in respect of the publication with the guardian newspaper dated, 02/02/00.
Let me start by introducing myself properly to you. I am JAMES KALAKU, CREDIT OFFICER, with the Union Bank of Nigeria, Plc, Lagos. I came to know of you in my private search for a reliable and reputable person to handle this confidential transaction which involves the transfer of a huge sum of money to a foreign account requiring maximum confidence.
A foreigner, Late DR D. VULYSTEKE an Oil Merchant/Contractor with the Federal Government of Nigeria, until his death months ago in the Kenyan Airways (A310-300) Flight KQ431, banked with us here at Union Bank of Nigeria Plc, Lagos and had a closing account balance as at the end of July, 2000 worth US$18.9M (Eighteen Million, Nine Hundred Thousand United States Dollars) only, which the Bank now expects a next of kin to claim as beneficiary.
Valuable efforts have been made by the Union Bank of Nigeria (UBN) Plc to get in touch with any of the VULYSTEKE_s family or relatives but to no avail.
It is because of the perceived possibility of not being able to locate any of Late DR D. VULYSTEKE_s next of kin (he had no wife nor children that is known to us). The management, under the influence of our Chairman and members of the board of Directors, have arranged for the funds to be declared _Unclaimable_and subsequently be donated to a special governmentTrust Fund.
In order to avert this negative development, some of my trusted colleagues and I now seek your permission to have you stand as next of kin to Late DR D. VULYSTEKE. So that the funds US$18.9M would be released and paid into your account as the beneficiary/next of kin. All documents and proofs to enable you get this fund will be carefully worked out.
We have secured from the Probate Registry an order of mandamus as it now stands and more so we are assuring you that this business is 100% hitch free. Your share stays while the rest would be for myself and my colleagues for investment purpose. According toagreement between both parties.
As soon as we receive an acknowledgement of receipt of the message in acceptance of our mutual business proposal, we would furnish you with the necessary modalities and disbursement ratio suitable for bothparties.
If this proposal is acceptable to you, then kindly contact me immediately via E-MAIL. Please furnish me with your most confidential Telephone/Fax number so that i can call you and throw more light onthis issue.PLEASE SEND YOUR RESPONSE TO THIS EMAIL ADDRESS. jk2002@themail.com

Thanks for your anticipated co-operation.
Yours Faithfully,


Dear James Kalaku

I am sorry to hear of your brain injury. Did the plane in question land on your head? Of course this will be kept TOP SECRET, in fact if you send me a few million dollars to my Swiss Bank Account # RUDUM 2277496-0IOU-687, I won't tell a soul. In fact, I will give you a few beans for your efforts. The money will be totally secure in my Special Safe Deposit Box (SSDB), where I also keep my Mr. Potato Head collection.
I too anticipate your undivided attention in this CONFIDENTIAL manner. Also, I would like to know something. If you went camping and you woke up with a condom hanging out of your ass, would you tell anyone? If not, would you like to go camping sometime?

The Very Irreverend
Phil McCrackin


Subject: HELLO

Dear Friend.

I hope all is well with you? I should say that it is more honourable to turn down this request than writing such, note that this is serious business, therefore it requires articulate response.

God bless and all the best in your endeavours. I only thought we could work together.

Best Regards.
James Kalaku.


Hi James

I am so sorry for my rather rude e-mail to you. I thought initially that you were some kind of snake oil salesman, bridge vendor, high-tech street hustler, or something of that ilk! Obviously you are a decent, pious businessman and one who can be trusted implicitly.

Please allow me to atone for my lack of trust in you by offering you some cash up front. If you promise to send me a mere $800,000.00 of that poor dead soul's money (in strict CONFIDENCE please), I will send you $80,000.00 ($U.S OK?) to your personal bank account. After all, I do not wish such a generous and hard-working man as yourself to have to bear all costs associated with this difficult transaction without remuneration.

Please send me your bank account information so that I may immediately transfer this $US80,000.00 to you as a token of my appreciation for your kindness and hard work. This will be our SECRET if this is acceptable to you. As I have never been involved in Nigerian banking before and as I am fairly na•ve about money in general, I trust that this $US80,000.00 will be sufficient to cover your considerable costs. If not, please e-mail me an invoice so that I may pay for any additional costs. I THANK YOU so much my dear friend for this gracious business venture! It is an opportunity that almost sounds too good to be true!

Hoping to hear from you soon!


Phil McCrackin

P.S. Believe it or not, Madame Cleo gave me a psychic reading predicting that I would be coming into money soon! Also last Friday, I broke open a fortune cookie that said "You will have good fortune". At last my luck is changing!




It is my pleasure to write you after my seven days fasting and prayers and much consideration since I can not be able to see you face to face at first.

Being the first and the only Daughter of my father, late PRINCE DENNIS TEGA from BETE in Republic of COTE D«IVOIRE Africa I am 21years of age. My father was limited liability cocoa and gold merchant in ABIDJAN before his untimely death after his business trip to SWITZERLAND, to negotiate on a cocoa business. A week after he came back from SWISS, he was assassinated with my mother by unknown assassins.

Which my mother died, instantly, but my father died after five days in hospital, on that faithful afternoon. I didn«t know that my father was going to leave me after I had lost my mother. But before he gave up the ghost, it was as if he knew he was going to die. He my father, (may his soul rest in perfect peace) he disclose to me that he deposited the sum of $5 million U.S dollars in a PRIVATE BANK here in ABIDJAN. That the money was meant for his cocoa business he wanted to invest in Abidjan - Côte d'Ivoire. Though, according to my father he deposited the money in his own name .

He single handed me over the document and logging and verifying informations , and instructed me to seek for a life time investment partner abroad.

Now I have succeeded in locating the BANK in here and also confirmed the fund is in there , most honest and confidentiality. Now I am soliciting for your assistance to help me lift this money out from SWISS BANK to your account abroad so that we should invest it in any lucrative business in your country.

I am Waiting anxiously to hear from you so that we can discuss the modalities of this transaction, Thanks for your kind attention and mutual understanding.

Best regards


Hi James

I have wonderful news for you! A fellow South African, Linda Tega, has just sent me an e-mail. By an unbelievable coincidence, she has had to endure a situation similar to the one that you have been saddled with. Although she only has a paltry $5 million to move, I believe that you could be of service to her by sending her request to everyone on your database. The power of networking might be the saviour of us all. Praise the Lord!

I figure that with her financial predicament being solved by your financial acumen, she would be an ideal mate for you to go on your next camping trip. Don't you agree that a young rich female form your neck of the woods would be a real catch for you? All That I ask is a small finder's fee (say a meager 10%= $US 500,000.00) and for you to sign a short waiver, absolving myself of any liability for such a said camping trip. Of course all of these arrangements will be TOP SECRET as it is kind of a 'pimp and ho' situation if you know what I mean. Don't forget to send me all for your CONFIDENTIAL banking information as I am eager to send off my hard-earned cash to you regarding our previous business agreement. Can you send me the money you owe me first, as I am a little short right now.


P.S. After your camping trip, could you direct Princess TEGA to a 'hooked on phonics course'... No wonder she is having trouble moving any cash over $1,000.00 ... thanks a bunch dear buddy!




We are pleased to inform you of the announcement today 7th January 2005 of your selection as one of the five winners of the promotional De Lotto held recently as part of our end of year lotto progamme.

You have therefore been approved for a lump sum pay out of US$1,500,000.00 (0ne Million, Five Hundred Thousand Dollars only) in cash credited to file REF: 74NL/505/-00885-DE .

We in the De Lotto is by this program, launching our model computer balloting lottery draws, developed and designed to satisfy the cravings of the ever growing number of participants in our various lottery programs. With funds accrued exclusively from previous draws, payouts to all winners are guaranteed and will be transferred in record time. After randomly selecting 15,000 participants from an initial database of 300,000 emails all participants were selected through a computer ballot system from the Middle East, Asia, Africa, Canada, Europe, USA and North America as part our International Promotions Program, which was conducted in view of launching ourselves into the Sweepstakes Industry Worldwide and zoning all participants by their respective continents from across the globe, we produced an extensive list from which you have emerged as one of the winners of the Grand Draw prize. To ensure a smooth collection of your winnings, the transfer of your prize is to be handled by our Prize Transfer agents .You are to contact our agents by email/fax or call within a week of receiving this notice. Be advice to keep your winning information confidential until your claims has been processed and your money remitted to you. This is part of our security protocol to avoid double claiming and unwarranted abuse of this program. Below is the contact details of your claim agent
Mr. Hans Boyer De La Maas
Foreign Service Manager,
Tel:+31 64 558 8386.
Fax:+31 84 739 4339.
EMAIL: investecbv1@excite.com
Also find all other relevant winning lottery information below:
REF: 74NL/505/-00885-DE .
Batch No: DE-808NL
Zonal Draw No: DE-A2-004-885
Grand Draw No: 13158

Remember, you must contact your claim agent not later than a week of receiving this notification. After this date, all funds will be returned as unclaimed.

In order to avoid unnecessary delays and complications, please remember to Quote your reference and batch numbers in every one of your correspondences with your agent.

Furthermore you are seriously advised to keep all winning lottery information and numbers from the public in line with our company security protocol to avoid double claiming and unwarranted abuse of this program by unscrupulous individuals.
Congratulations again from all our staff and thank you for being part of our Promotions program.

Yours Sincerely,

N.B. Any breach of confidentiality on the part of the winners will result to Disqualification. Contact your claim agent as instructed above.


To: 'antongeesink@post.com'
Cc: 'jk2002@themail.com'; 'investecbv1@excite.com'
Subject: RE: HELLO Great Fortune and Goodbye Poverty

Hello James, Linda, and now Anton

Well good fortune continues to smile on me! I just can't believe my luck in receiving yet another rare opportunity to gain a huge fortune for doing squat. As with my other benefactors Anton, I should really insist on paying you a hefty handler's fee for brokering such an unbelievable deal.

IT MUST BE SECRET. Can I pay you this in cash as to not leave a paper trail back to my winnings? The Government would surely want to tax the Hell (sorry for the devil reference Reverend Kalaku) out of my winnings.

Maybe after receiving this cool 1.5 mil, I could then entice the lovely Linda Tega to finally go on a camping trip with me. I could take her first class and give it to her 'in the Winnebago' if you know what I mean ;). I would not normally go for multiple business opportunities of such high gain and low personal risk but how can I say "No" to a former gold medallist in judo? I mean even if he is over 60 years old (and probably dead) he could still throw me on my head. Don't let the Japanese know I've won this prize Anton, as they are still mad about losing that gold medal (not to mention the War).

Well I must be off now to get that cash out of the bank so I can finally see my winnings appear. I can't wait to see the faces of all the naysayers when I pull in my windfall. Keep the cash and good will flowing friends!!!....Phil



You may be surprised to receive this letter from me since you do not know me personally. I am JUDE KONA the son of MARK KONA a farmer in Zimbabwe who was recently murdered in the land dispute in my country. I got your contact through network online hence decided to write you. Before the death of my father, deposited the sum of US13 million (Thirteen million, United States dollars), in a private security company in europe, as he foresaw the looming danger in Zimbabwe this money was deposited in a box as family valuable to avoid much demurrage from security company. This amount was meant for the purchase of new machines and chemicals for the Farms and establishment of new farms in Swaziland.

This land problem came when Zimbabwean President Mr.Robert Mugabe introduced a new Land Act Reform wholly affecting the rich white farmers and some few black farmers, and this resulted to the killing and mob action by Zimbabwean war veterans and some lunatics in the society. In fact a lot of people were killed because of this Land reform Act for which my father and mother were among the victims. It is against this background that, I and my family fled Zimbabwe for fear of our lives and are currently staying in the Benin Republic where we are seeking political asylum and more so have decided to transfer my father's money to a more reliable foreign account. since the law of Benin Republic prohibits a refugee (asylum seeker) to open any bank account or to be involved in any financial transaction throughout the territorial zone of Benin Republic, As the eldest son of my father, I am saddled with the responsibility of seeking a genuine partner that could assist me without the knowledge of my government who are bent on taking everything we have got.

I am seeking for a partner who I have to entrust my future and that of my family in his hands, I must let you know that this transaction is risk free. If you accept to assist me and my family, all I want you to do for me, is to make an arrangements with the security company to clear the consignment(funds) from the security company in europe

as i have already notified the security company that i will be deligating someone to assist me in claiming the consignment. But before then all modalities will have to be put in place like change of ownership of the consignment and more importantly this money I intend to use it for investment.

I have two options for you. Firstly you can choose to have certain percentage of the money for nominating your account for this transaction. Or you can go into partnership with me for the proper profitable investment of the money in your country. Whichever the option you want, feel free to notify me.

I have also mapped out 5% of this money for all kinds of expenses incurred that will be in the process of this transaction.If you do not prefer a partnership I am willing to give you 25% of the money while the remaining 70% will be for my investment in your country. Contact me with the above email address, while I implore you to maintain the absolute secrecy required in this transaction.


Yours Faithfully



Hi Jude

I am indeed surprised to hear from you! Sorry to hear of your father's murder. Did a plane land on his head? There have been several amazing coincidences involving money transfers and the like. I really hope that I can get in on some of the action before it's too late, like before I get bit by a rabid monkey or I get a hernia rushing to aid you in your righteous plight. Yes, there's all kinds of charlatans posing as financial do-gooders. It almost makes me want to vomit into my panty hose when I think of those bad people who are saddling you with this burden (better that than a leather one eh chap!).

I have attached e-mails from others with similar plights with the hope that my new POWER OF GLOBAL NETWORKING ® can assist you with your noble cause (yes I have gone into this lucrative business big time!!).

All the best in your endeavors. May the fleas of a thousand camels infest your armpits! I mean that it the nice way ;).



From: "mariam abacha" <mrsmaab05@yahoo.com>



I am Hajia Mariam Abacha the wife of the formal head of state the Fedral Republic of Nigeran Late General Sani Abacha.

Following the sudden death of my husband General Sani Abacha the late former head of state of Nigeria in June 1998, I have been thrown into a state of utter confusion, frustration and hopelessness by the present civilian administration, I have been subjected to physical and psychological torture by the security agents in the country.

I have lost confidence with anybody within the country. You must have heard over the media reports and the internet on the recovery of various huge sums of money deposited by my husband in different security firms abroad, some companies willingly give up their secrets and disclosed our money confidently lodged there or many out right blackmail. In fact the total sum discovered by the Government so far is in the tune of $700. Million dollars. And they are not relenting to make me poor for life.

I got your contacts through my personal research, and out of desperation decided to reach you. I will give you more information as to this regard as soon as you reply. I repose great confidence in you hence my approach to you due to security network placed on my day affairs I cannot afford to visit the embassy so that is why I decided to contact you and I hope you will not betray my confidence in you. I have deposited the sum of 48.3 million dollars with a security firm abroad whose name is with held for now until we open communication.

I shall be grateful if you could receive this fund into your account for safe keeping. This arrangement is known to you and my son Mustapha Abacha alone who have just been relised by the Federal Government , so my son will deal directly with you as security is up my whole being.

I am seriously considering to settle down abroad in a friendly atmosphere like yours as soon as this fund get into your account so that I can start all over again if only you wish, but if it is impossible, just help me in diverting this fund into your account which will accrue you 30% of this fund . Please honesty is the watch word in this transaction.

In case you dont accept please do not let me out to the security as I am giving you this information in total trust and confidence

I will greatly appreciate if you accept my proposal in good faith. Please expedite action.

Sincerely yours

Hajia Mariam Abacha


Hi Hajia

I have had little time to correspond to you because of the success of my PODMC ®© program (see below for the details of this rich acronym). Just tell me how much US cash I need to buy into your proposal, and please feel free to spend some on a 'spell checker', and some teeth (as I suspect the case maybe).



To: 'jk2002@themail.com'
Cc: 'mrsmaab05@yahoo.com'

Hi James

More great news! The letter from Ms. Abacha (newly single!) opens up yet another totally unique business opportunity that can't be missed. Forget Ms.Tega's paltry few millions ... we have a new avenue to instant wealth. Perhaps you both can transfer money to each other's SECRET accounts and pay me the lowly middleman, a few million for my troubles. With all the earnings, perhaps we can skip camping all together and go into Winnebego mode (same confidentiality rules apply re the condom thing though ... and of course the appropriate waivers would have to be signed). So let's get networking shall we?


Praise the Lord ... the networking continues ...


From: "edward smith" <eddyzsmith@tsamail.co.za>

Dear friend,

I am Mr Edward Smiths the personal driver to Mr Robert Brown the director of Highbrons construction company contracted under the ministry of mines and power for the completion of the last phase of the multi billion dollars Ajaokuta steel project here in Nigeria.

I have been his chauffer for the past twelve years and before his departure six months ago to Italy for the procurement of some of the industrial machineries for the Ajaokuta project completion we the workers has not been paid which made the workers union to go on strike.

Fortunately for us and unfortunately for Mr Brown the personel manager phoned him and intimated him of the strike.

Mr Brown on hearing of the strike had to rush down to Nigeria so as to have us paid and have the work continued.

I was despatched to go and pick him up at the airport in Abuja upon his arrival and after picking him from the airport we headed for Ajaokuta in Minna Niger state where the site is.

It was unfortunate that when we arrived Suleja he saw some women selling fruits and opted to buy some so i had to stop.

Unlikely of him i would have gone to buy the fruits but he decided to do it by himself.

After buying the fruits and was coming back to the car he looked right and left there was no car though there was a bend and immediately he entered the road to cross over a car came out from that very bend and that was the end of my master because he was rushed to the hospital though it was too late to save his life.

The workers on hearing of the death of Mr Brown started demonstration which resulted in carting away company properties.

As the driver i had not option than to force open the briefcase which is still inside the car and discovered a huge amount of money infact at first i got confused.

At the moment i cannot invest the fund in Nigeria because that will create avenue for the Nigerian government to suspect me of foul play.

I want you to just indicate your interest to assist me get the fund transfered to any European country for investment and i will give to you every document of coverage.

It may interest you to know that i never made mention of this money to anyone and neither did i stop coming to work.

I am still coming to work and the work is in progress now because the mother company in Italy sent another director to come and continue from where Mr Brown stopped.

I was first accused of keeping his briefcase because they knew that he left Italy with a briefcase but since no one can prove that i am with the briefcase i was discharged and aquitted for lack of evidence.

I will stop here until, I receive your response.

Thanks and God bless.

Mr Edward Smiths.


Hi Eddy

Boy there sure are a lot of rich people getting snuffed lately, but at least you got a ton of money to console yourself with. Good on you for grabbing the cash bud! I was thinking that with all of my 'accidental' contacts, you should enrol in my 'Power of Dead Man's Cash' © program. It was really designed for poor unfortunates like yourself who have been unfairly saddled into trying to unload, under strictest confidence of course, such unwieldy capital. Let the power of positive networking continue!

Although you don't state so in your ever so provocative letter, I know that you must be seeking someone like myself to help divest yourself of this most unwanted windfall, even though your master ended up as 'street pizza'. Might I suggest then that I send to you immediately 10% cash up front for whatever amount you may have to rid yourself of. The sheer genius of my program is that I will send you this cash for all of your hard work up front by getting the Dead Man's Cash ® in the first place, and you will be obligated to send me a tax-free 'gift' for a substantially higher amount of money! What could go wrong?

Thank god for reckless Nigerian fruit buyers being turned into high-speed hood ornaments, Nigerian physical and psychological torturers, Kenyan Airways death-plane riders, unfortunate victims of Zimbabwean war mobs, and of course the ever so popular Republic of COTE D'IVOIRE Princess Assassins ®, otherwise I would not have the rare opportunity to invest so freely in the 'Power of Dead Man's Cash' © program!

Please send me, under the strictest of confidentiality, your personal details to your bank account so that I can deposit this cash right not without delay!

Thank you for playing!

Phil McCracken

P.S. I went camping with the Lovely Princess Tega last weekend and she was a real handful, let me tell you. My only complaint was that her diamond belly piercing kept scratching the back of my neck. If you see her in this networking wonder, give her one for the gipper! And whatever happened to that proposal related to Anton Geesink?


From: "andrew williams" <andrew_williams1@go.com>

As you read this, I don't want you to feel sorry for me, because, I believe everyone will die someday. My name is Aadrew Williams, a merchant in U.K. I have been diagnosed with Esophageal cancer . It has defiled all forms of medical treatment, and right now I have only about a few months to live, according to medical experts. I have not particularly lived my life so well, as I never really cared for anyone(not even myself)but my business.

Though I am very rich, I was never generous, I was always hostile to people and only focused on my business as that was the only thing I cared for. But now I regret all this as I now know that there is more to life than just wanting to have or make all the money in the world. I believe when God gives me a second chance to come to this world,I would live my life a different way from how I have lived it. Now that God has called me, I have willed and given most of my property and assets to my immediate and extended family members as well as a few close friends. I want God to be merciful to me and accept my soul so I have decided to give also to charity organizations, as I want this to be one of the last good deeds I do on earth. So far, I have distributed money to some charity organizations in the U.A.E, Algeria and Malaysia. Now that my health has deteriorated so badly, I cannot do this myself anymore. I once asked members of my family to close one my accounts and distribute the money which I have there to charity organizations in Asia and U.K, they refused and kept the money to themselves. Hence, I do not trust them anymore, as they seem not to be contended with what I have left for them. The last of my money which no one knows of is the huge cash deposit of twenty five million dollars $25,000,000.00 that I have with a finance institution in Europe. I will want you to help me collect this deposit and dispatche it to charity organizations. I have set aside 20% for you and some expences that may incure during the proccess of these transaction. God be with you. Please reach me through my personal email address of: andrewwillams@walla.com remember to keep this known to yourself alone and I for now,as I am doing this as a contribution to life on earth. I will also appreciate if you provide me with your contact mobile and home phone numbers, so that i can forward them to a reputable lawyer who would put you through the whole process. I will really appreciate your quick response.

Stay Blessed,

Andrew Williams


Hi Andrew

Stay blessed? My God, I really do feel lucky that I have missed Nigerian death mobs, tragic plane crashes, deadly assassins, and now cancer of the esophagus. Too bad you are too ill to get rid of all your personal booty ... please let me help via my 'Power of Dead Man's Cash' © program. Please feel free* to network with some of my happy graduates!


Sorry, I just remembered that you can't drink without a throat ... but how can you type this letter if you are so ill? Oh well, best of luck ... sign up now in my program and I'll give you a free* life membership to my Scam of the Month Club ® (you get a free* set of business cards for the air of respectability).

*free means 40% of your scamming profits or else you get a Jihad on you that will bruise your Karma


From: ABAMARAC [ABAMARAC@terra.es]


Alternative email:chukwuka@web-mail.com.ar.

Dear Sir,


May I respectfully invite your kind attention to the above subject matter and to state that based on information gathered from the relevant Federal Ministry of Trade, Commerce and Tourism, we, intend to solicit your assistance in the execution of a business transaction.
It is our sincere conviction that you will handle this transaction with absolute confidentiality, maturity and utmost sense of purpose.
I wish to further inform you that we have twenty Million U.S. Dollars (US$20M) which accrued overtime from deliberately inflated contract awarded in my Ministry (Federal Ministry of Petroleum Resources) and executed by a consortium of multinationals in the Oil Industry. The projects executed include the following:
1. The expansion of pipeline network within Nigeria for Crude Oil and Downstream products distribution and subsequent evacuation.
2. Contract for the Turn Around Maintenance (TAM) of the three Refineries In the country.
3. The construction of storage tanks for Petroleum Products (Depots).

Consequently, we humbly request your gracious assistance and permission towards the remittance of the above stated amount into a personal/company/offshore account nominated by you.

We propose tentatively that you will receive 30% of the total sum, and the remaining 70% is for my colleagues and me. However, this is negotiable in the event of your willingness to assist.

Could you please notify me of your acceptance to carry out this transaction urgently by email email addresses: chukwuka@web-mail.com.ar only, on the receipt of this message. I shall in turn inform you of the modalities for a formal application to secure the necessary approvals for the release of this fund into your account.

This transaction from the day of commencement will not take more than ten(10) working days.

Thanks for your co-operation.

Yours sincerely
Dr.Abraham Amarachukwu


Hello Dr. Alphabet

Today is indeed you lucky day because I am currently running my Power of Dead Man's Cash © program. No one's dead you say? Well don't let a little life get in the way of your finely-tuned business plan because as a special offer to you I have the highly-coveted and secret Scam of the Month Club ® . All you have to do is to send me particulars as to why your scam is better than the ones attached, and I'll induct your into this fast growing money maker if you pass our stringent guidelines. Be clear that we are looking for those savvy individuals who are willing to prey on the weak of mind and elderly infirm without any compunctions of conscience. Are you up to the challenge dear friend? Once you send me a certified money order for a mere $USD100,000.00 (a naked picture of yourself is optional), you get a shiny new business card to show you are a truly big shot who means business AND you will get the details of the secret handshake (complete with the ever so popular secret palm tickle)!

With your TAM (Turn Around Maintenance) contract happening with my now-suggested PONS (Pick Only Nigerian Suckers) work force potential, we could really stick it to them and bleed them dry. What do you think, are you in or what?

I am so proud that my POWER OF GLOBAL NETWORKING ®program is doing so well. I have made over 32 million dollars in my first few weeks of operation. I guess I shouldn't talk about bleeding and operations to an actual doctor like yourself. Please let me know, under the strictest confidence of course, whether you want in at the grass roots level (is there grass in Nigeria, what with all of the pipelines, plane crashes and stuff like that going on, it may not be a phrase that conjers up success like a shrunken head would).


Phil McCrackin

"Say 'No' to a smoking crack"


From: "frank goldman" <frankgol@mailbox.co.za>
Subject: Request.....

FROM: Mr Frank Goldman,

I am a staff of a reputable bank here in South Africa. I will give you the name of the bank and other important information if I receive a positive reply from you. For security reasons I cannot disclose my full identity to you for now until I am sure of your cooperation. I work in the operations dept where I serve as account officer to numerous customers. One of the customers whom I worked as his account officer was a wealthy diamond merchant from the Republic of Sierra Leone, a country in West Africa. He lost his family in the war. He was lucky to escape alive and came to this country with his wealth.

Unfortunately he died few years back. Because this man was good to me when he was alive, I took it upon myself to travel to his country last month, to see if I could locate any of his close relations. On reaching there I discovered that his only surviving uncle died a few months back. I sponsored this trip on my own and nobody in the bank knew I was undertaking the journey so I did not present any official report of my findings in South Africa.

Now there are two things I could do with respect to the dead man's money. First, as his accounts officer, I could formally notify the bank authorities that the man is dead and has no next of kin. In this case the money would be forfeited to the government after some time. 0n the other hand, I can arrange for someone, a foreigner, to act as the next of kin of the late man so that he/she can claim the money. This is the option l have decidedd to take to help myself and whoever that God brings my way. I took this option after my findings that this fund actually was a public fund looted by highly place government officials under the brutal military government. I want you to be my partner. All you would have to do is act as the next of kin of the dead man and the whole money in the account will be transferred to your nominated bank account. As the account/s officer to the late man, I have all the necessary documents that you require to claim the money in the account.

The total money in the account is USD$15 million. hope to resign my job as a banker to join you in a viable business partnership at the eventual transfer of this fund. Kindly Reach me immediately
Also provide me with your direct telephone and fax numbers for easy communication.

Yours truly,


Hi FrankM

The wonders of my POWER OF GLOBAL NETWORKING ® fails to even ceases to amaze me, but I am just stuck in the African market. I must find out how to break into the European market. Maybe a suicide bomber could fit the bill nicely (perhaps an heir to the Harry potter fortune that was blown up on a subway would be topical ... instead of tropical;). My 'Power of Dead Man's Cash' © is really coming into fruition, what with plane crashes, brutal military dictatorships, throat cancers, and even over-financed pipelines, sexy Nigerian Princess' (that tramp Tega drank my last Coors Light when I was banging her in my Winnebego, so it's not all an easy go at this end ;). I am giving you this exclusive offer of getting into my Scam of the Month Club ®, complete with business card, secret handshake (and I'll throw in some cash for a Spellchecker for you ... as you are a respected banker you know).

So all you have to do is to send me a whole hoard of cash to my account in the Grand Cayman Islands, change your name to 'Dusty Diamonds', and you are well on your way to 'Freedom 50', and a new set of teeth.

Good luck with your swindling!

Phil McCrackin

"If you are a turkey, then I have a crack worth stuffing"


From: "Frank Dave" <frankdave@virgilio.it>
Subject: **JUNK** From Frank!

Attention friend,

I am mr. Frank Dave,i am contacting you in regards to a business transfer of sum money from a deceased customer's account who on the 25th of July 2000 died alongside with his family in the crash of the Air France Concorde flight 4590.

Although I know that a transaction of this magnitude might make anyone apprehensive,I would like to assure you that i am sending you this mail with the best of intensions.

Since then we have been trying to get this funds out of the bank,the sum of US$14,200,000.00 (fourteen Million two hundred thousand United StatesDollars) in an account that belongs to him since his death,after my long investigation to my greatest surprise, I found out that this account has no beneficiary next of kin, in fact no other person knows about this account or anything about the account.

This money cannot be release from his account unless someone applies for claim as the next-of-kin to the deceased as indicated in our banking guidelines.

Upon this discovery,I now seek your permission to have you stand as a next of kin to the deceased as all documentations will be carefully worked out by us for the funds to be released in your favour as the beneficiary's next of kin.

I am only contacting you as a foreigner because this money cannot be claimed by an indigene nor approved to a local bank here considering the fact that the rightful owner of the account is a foreigner. So a foreigner is needed to act as the next of kin to this account to avoid raising an eye brow.

Please acknowledge receipt of this message in acceptance of our mutual business endeavour by furnishing me with the following

1. Your Full Names and Address.
2. Direct Telephone and Fax numbers.

These requirements will enable us file a letter of claim to the appropriate departments for necessary approvals in your favour before the transfer can be made.I shall be compensating you with 15% of this sum. 5% will mapped out for any expenses both side might incure at the end of the transaction.

The rest will be for my side. You will keep your share while my own remains in your account for further investment when I will come to your country.

I know that this mail will come to you as a surprise as we do not know each other before.

I will give you more information as regard to this as soon as you reply.

I await your urgent response to this email.

Frank Dave.


Hi Frank

It does seem like I have known you for a while and you seem quite trustworthy. Please let me first apologize for not writing you back but, with so many scammers (not yet registered in my Scam of the Month Club ® ) I had thought that it was dealt with. As it turns out another 'Frank' (Frank Goldman ... soon to be known as 'Dusty Diamonds' ®) had also contacted me, hence to be frank with you too, there lied the confusion in this matter.

I must caution you about several matters. Firstly, the 'Power of Dead Man's Cash' © no longer accepts scams involving lees than $USD20,000.00 (or 267,000,000.00 Nigerian nibblets). Hey, we all have to make a living. Secondly, since you are not registered in the abovementioned SOTMC, but are clearly now part of my POWER OF GLOBAL NETWORKING ® program, you must send to me:

1. Your Full Names and Address.
2. Direct Telephone and Fax numbers

How does that feel hot-shot? Now that the table tables are turned my friend, cough up some huge coin before I get shark-suited legal beagle on your ass and sue you for everything you even dreamed of stealing.

P.S. Was the late DR D. VULYSTEKE (an Oil Merchant/Contractor with the Federal Government of Nigeria as you may recall by reading the correspondence) on the same flight as your dear friend? If not, is it possible that Kenyan Airways (A310-300) Flight KQ431 collided mid-air with Air France Concorde flight 4590, killing them both, even though it was years apart? I have a keen sense of connectedness in all of these e-mails, like there is a common hidden theme. As I said to Princess Tega (the little cheap Winnegego-wallower, trollop-licker) before I took her camping: "There's something I like about you, but I just can't put my finger on it".