JERRY KABILA
From: k.jerry@tiscali.co.uk [mailto:k.jerry@tiscali.co.uk]Sent: Friday, September 05, 2003 5:33 AM
Received: from mk-smarthost-1.mail.uk.tiscali.com (mk-smarthost-1.mail.uk.tiscali.com [212.74.114.37])
Subject: LETTER OF ENQUIRY
FROM: MR.JERRY D. KABILA
REQUEST FOR A BUSINESS RELATIONSHIP
I WANT TO FIRST OF ALL REQUEST FOR A STRICT SECRECY AND CONFIDENTIALITY WHICH WILL BE OF MUTUAL BENEFIT TO BOTH PARTIES INVOLVED IN THIS TRANSACTION.I AM JERRY D. KABILA SON TO LATE PRESIDENT OF THE DEMOCRATIC REPUBLIC OF CONGO,MR LAURENT D. KABILA WHO WAS BRUTALLY MURDERED BY ONE OF HIS PERSONAL SECURITY BODY GUARD WHOM WAS BELIEVED TO HAVE BEEN SPONSORED BY MEMBERS OF THE REBEL GROUPS IN OUR COUNTRY.
DURING HIS REIGN, I FRONTED FOR HIM IN THE SALES OF DIAMOND AND TANTALITE TO SOME DUTCH AND FRENCH COMPANIES AND THE PROCEEDS $19.5 MILLION (USD) PAID BACK TO HIM WHICH HE KEPT IN A TRUNK BOX AND MOVED IT INTO A SECURITY COMPANY IN ACCRA GHANA. AFTER HIS DEATH AND THE IMMEDIATE APPOINTMENT OF OUR ELDER BROTHER PRESIDENT JOSEPH KABILA HE REQUESTED THAT I SHOULD BRING BACK THE DOCUMENTS OF THIS DEPOSIT BECAUSE THEY ARE ALL AWARE THAT IAM THE ONLY ONE GAVEN SUCH TASK BY MY LATE FATHER BUT I DECLINE THAT I DON'T HAVE SUCH DOCUMENTS WITH ME HENCES HE HAS BEEN ELECTED THE PRESIDENT, I AM ENTILTED TO WHAT I CAN LAY MY HANDS ON AS A FORM OF INHERITANCES FROM OUR LATE FATHER BECAUSE MY FATHER HAS TWO WIVES SO EVERY ONE HAS TO CATERED FOR THEIR MOTHERS.
I AM CONFIDING IN YOU NOT TO LET THIS OUT TO ANYONE.I INTEND TO GO INTO PARTNERSHIP AGREEMENT WITH YOU FOR OUR INVESTMENT, AS WE WILL BOTH AGREE UPON. I WANT TO AS A MATTER OF TRUST AND URGENCY TO HELP ME MOVE THESE FUNDS OUT OF AFRICA.FOR EASY COMMUNICATION, I REQUIRE WITHOUT DELAY YOUR FULLDATAS. A.S.A.P.
I WILL GIVE YOU MY OTHER MEANS OF COMMUNICATION AS SOON AS I HEAR FROM YOU.I AM PRESENTLY IN A PRIVATE YATCH ON EAST PACIFIC OCEAN HEADING TOWARDS ACCRA GHANA WHERE I INTEND WE WOULD MEET TO PACKAGE THIS TRANSACTION SOONEST.YOU WOULD BE ADEQUATELY REWARDED IF YOU CAN ASSIST US AND GUARANTEE US YOUR TRUST WHEN THE MONIES ARE IN YOUR POSSESSION.YOUR URGENT REPLY ARE REQUIRE AND AM LOOKING FORWARD TO YOUR ACCEPTANCE IN EARNEST.
REGARDS
JERRY D. KABILA
COUNT
Dear Mr. Kabila,Thank you for selecting me as a potential business partner.
I submit to you my references for review.
Company Name: IMAGYPSY Inc.
Location: New York City, USA
Fax: 775-628-XXXX
Phone: 775-628-XXXX
Bank Reference: Nomadic Bank of America
Location: New York City, USA
Notes: Various money market funds, business checking, 401k earnings and mutual funds
2002 Gross Sales: $22.5 million
2002 Gross Profit: $6.8 million
Liquid Cash: $2.1 million
Presently, I am considering a purchase of a building on W 57th St. in New York. The cost is $3.4 Million USD. That actually comes out to about 17% of your cache of money. I think that is a reasonable amount of exchange to assist your transaction. I could also assist in investing your remaining balance, as well as obtaining a working visa for the US at my company.
Please submit the additional modalities of your transaction for my review as well. Also, I am a Count, please refer to me with that due title.
I look forward to your response.
Sincerely,
The Count
(Note: The phone numbers are legit, they are just my callwave.com fax numbers that will always ring as a fax to annoy any and all callers)
JERRY KABILA
Subject: EXPECTING YOUR URGENT RESPONSES.ATTN: THE COUNT
DEAR SIR,
THANKING YOU VERY MUCH FOR YOUR KIND HEARTED AND WELL UNDERSTOOD MAIL, AS I SO MUCH APPRECIATE YOUR MAIL, WHICH CLEARLY INDICATE YOUR WILLINGNESS TO ASSIST ME AND MY FAMILY EFFECTIVELY IN REALIZING THIS GOLDEN OPPORTUNITY, WE HAVE PRAYED AND COMMITTED THIS TRANSACTION INTO THE HANDS OF GOD ALMIGHTY AND I STRONGLY BELIEVE THAT THIS RELATIONSHIP I AM ESTABLISHING WITH YOU ON TRUST AND IN BENEVOLENT SPIRIT WILL NOT LEAD TO JEOPARDY,RATHER, YOUR UTMOST COOPERATION,SINCERITY AND CONFIDENTIALITY WILL BE GIVEN TO ME IN COURSE OF THIS TRANSACTION,TO BE HONEST WITH YOU,AM QUITE APPRECIATIVE OF HAVING THE OPPORTUNITY TO HEAR FROM YOU BECAUSE IT'S VERY HARD FOR SOMEONE TO LISTEN OR PARTICIPATE IN A TRANSACTION OF THIS VALUE, COUPLED WITH THE FACT THAT WE HAVE NOT EVEN KNOWN EACH OTHER SURROUNDED WITH DISTRUST IN THE WORLD AROUND US TODAY; THANKS ONCE AGAIN!.
SIR COUNT,FIRSTLY I WISH TO LET YOU KNOW MORE ABOUT ME AND MY FAMILY, MY LATE FATHER,HE WAS BORN ON JANUARY 01,1938 IN ANKORO,SHABA IN ZAIRE. AND HE ATTENDED HIS STUDIES IN FRANCE; MILITARY SCHOOL IN CHINA IN 1960 AND HE ATTENDED THE UNIVERSITY OF DAR ES SALAAM. HE WAS ALSO INTO PRECIOUS MATERIALS; LIKE GOLD AND DIAMOND E.T.C.AND I WAS BORN IN CONGO FORMER ZAIRE AND MY FATHER HAS MANY CHILDREN AS HE HAD SOME MARITAL AFFAIRS OUT SIDE HIS MARRIAGE. MY MOTHER IS RIGHT NOW STILL IN CONGO TAKING CARE OF MY TWO CHILDREN,JERRY JR.AND EDITH,I ALSO HAVE MY YOUNGER ONES(TWO BOYS AND ONE GIRL) AND I AM NOW 33YEARS OLD. WE INHERITED THIS CONSIGNMENT AS ME AND MY MOTHER WAS FRONTING FOR HIM(MY FATHER)IN HIS TANTALITE AND HIS PRECIOUS METAL BUSINESS AS HE WAS STILL IN POWER THEN, AND HE SO MUCH TRUSTED MY MOTHER BECAUSE SHE WAS MORE EDUCATED THEN THE FIRST WIFE,SO WE GOT TO INHERIT THIS MONEY BECAUSE ALL THE RELEVANT DOCUMENTATIONS WAS IN OUR POSITION BEFORE THE DEATH MY FATHER AND MY ELDER BROTHER BEING THE FIRST SON OF THE FIRST WIFE OF MY FATHER WAS ELECTED AS THE NEW PRESIDENT OF MY COUNTRY CONGO,SO WE HAVE TO HOLD ON TO WHATEVER THAT WAS IN OUR POSITION BECAUSE THE TWO FAMILY HAVE NOT BEING IN GOOD TERMS BEFORE THE DEATH OF OUR FATHER,JUST BECAUSE OUR FATHER LOVES MY MOTHER MORE THEN THE FIRST WIFE.
SIR,I HAVE GOTTEN THE DETAILS OF YOU AND YOUR COMPANY AND I BELIEVE WITH YOU,WE CAN TOGETHER SUCCESSFULLYGET THIS LIFE TIME BUSINESS OPPORTUNITY THROUGH WITHOUT MUCH DELAYS AS I CAN SEE THAT WITH YOUR HELP AND POSITION WE COULD INVEST THIS FUND VERY WELL IN SOME VERY GOOD AND VIABLE BUSINESS TOGETHER WITH YOU IN YOUR COUNTRY.I REALLY WISH TO ASSURE YOU AT THISJUNCTION OF THE SERIOUSNESS OF THIS TRANSACTION AND MY SINCERITY OF PURPOSE AND GENUINE INTENTIONS, PLEASE MARK MY WORD;YOU WILL NEVER REGRET HELPING US IN THIS TRANSACTION AS I ASSURE YOU THAT YOU STAND TO GAIN AND ADD MORE TO YOUR ALREADY ACHIEVED AIM, BECAUSE WE INTENDED TO MAKE YOU SOLELY THE PROXY HOLDER OF THIS FUND FOR OUR FUTURE VIABLE INVESTMENT PROJECTS TOGETHER IN COUNTRY.I ALSO WANT TO RE-ASSURE YOU THAT THIS IS REAL.I SAID THIS BECAUSE OPPORTUNITIES LIKE THIS SOMETIMES COMES SO EASILY AND THAT MAKES IT VERY DIFFICULT TO BELIEVE WHEN IT COME, BUT THE ABILITY TO REALIZE THE POTENTIALS OF THIS OPPORTUNITIES IS WHAT MAKES THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN GREAT MEN AND THE ORDINARY PEOPLE,SO I BELIEVE YOU ARE CAPABLE OF HANDLING AND TAKING CARE OF THIS TRANSACTION?. AS IWANT TO HAVE YOUR WORD OF HONOR IN THIS TRANSACTION SO THAT I CAN SUBMIT YOUR NAME TO THE SECURITY COMPANY FOR THE APPROVAL OF YOUR NAME AS THE NEW BENEFICIARY TO THE CONSIGNMENT.
SIR,AFTER DUE DELIBERATION WITH MY MOTHER,WE HAVE CONCLUDED TO GIVE YOU 20% OF THE TOTAL FUND AS SOON AS WE HAVE CONFIRMED THE FUND IN YOUR FOREIGN BANK ACCOUNT,AS I WILL ALSO LIKE INFORM YOU THAT WE HAVE ALREADY TAKEN THE SERVICE OF AN ATTORNEY WHO IS GOING TO MAKE OUT AN ASSET MANAGEMENT AGREEMENT WHICH WILL HAVE TO BE SIGNED BY BOTH PARTIES(YOU AND ME ),AS WE INTEND TO MAKE YOU SOLELY THE PROXY HOLDER OF THE FUNDS,SO WITH YOU AND YOUR COMPANY,I KNOW WE CAN TOGETHER GET THIS TRANSACTION THROUGH SOONEST WITH YOUR CO-OPERATION AND CONFIDENTIALITY.I WILL ALSO LIKE YOU TO KNOW THAT ALL THE DOCUMENTS COVERING THIS TRANSACTION ARE IN MY CARE,EVEN THE CERTIFICATE OF ORIGIN OF THIS FUND IS ALREADY IN THE TRUNK BOX AND THE CERTIFICATE OF DEPOSIT AND THE TERMS OF CONTACT AGREEMENT MY LATE FATHER MADE WITH THE SECURITY COMPANY IS IN MY POSITION IN THEIR ORIGINAL COPIES AND THE BENEFICIARY CERTIFICATE WHICH HAS TO BE CHANGED AND APPROVED TO YOUR NAME BY THE SECURITY COMPANY WHERE THE CONSIGNMENT IS BEEN DEPOSITED, ON APPROVAL AND SIGNED BY BOTH PARTIES,IT WILL HAVE TO BE NOTARIZED BY OUR APPOINTED LAWYER IN THE HIGH COURT OF JUSTICES HERE IN ACCRA GHANA SO THAT IT WILL BE FULLY LEGALIZED YOUR NAME AS THE NEW BENEFICIARY TO THE CONSIGNMENT BEFORE WE COULD APPLY FOR THE FINAL CLEARANCE OF THE CONSIGNMENT FROM THE SECURITY COMPANY,HOPE YOU CAN UNDERSTAND ME?.I WILL ALSO LIKE YOU TO KNOW THAT ME AND MY FAMILY WILL HAVE TO FINALLY SETTLE DOWN IN YOUR COUNTRY AS SOON AS WE CONCLUDE THIS TRANSACTION,SO YOU WILL LATER BE MAKING EVERY NECESSARY ARRANGEMENT ON HOW ME AND MY ENTIRE FAMILY WILL MOVE TO STAY WITH YOU OVER THERE IN YOUR COUNTRY,BECAUSE OUR ELDERS ALWAYS SAY A PROVERB;THAT WHERE YOUR TREASURE IS THERE WILL BE YOUR MIND.
THANKS IN ANTICIPATION AS I HOPE TO STOP SO FAR,AM LOOKING FORWARD TO YOUR URGENT RESPONSES ,AS I WILL ALSO LIKE YOU TO SEND ACROSS TO ME YOUR DIRECT MOBILE LINE,SO THAT I CAN AS-WELL GET ACROSS TO YOU AS WE REALLY NEED TO SPEAK ON THE TELPEHONE BECAUSE THAT WILL ALSO ENHANCE MORE MUTUAL TRUST AND PROPER UNDERSTANDING. PLEASE EXTEND MY SINCERE GREETINGS TO YOUR ENTIRE FAMILY AND EVERYONE AROUND YOU.PLEASE IF YOU NEED ANY FURTHER CLEARIFICATION,AM AWAITING TO PROVIDE THEM TO YOU. MAY ALMIGHTY GOD CONTINUE BLESSING AND GUIDING YOU AND THE MONKEY.
WITH BEST REGARDS,
YOURS TRULY,
JERRY KABILA.
COUNT
Dear brother Jerry,Thanks for the information and confidence. I am pleased to assist and it was nice meeting you. Thank you for the information. Your generosity and offer of 20% is more than ample. I gladly accept. My direct phone is 775-628-XXXX if needed.
Now that you have provided your biography, let me offer a quick overview of mine. I was actually born in Bavaria, a province of Germany. My birth name is Vladimir. My father was killed tragically in October 1981 while working at a Scorpions concert in Berlin. He was a roadie by trade, and suffered a fatal injury when a light fixture fell from the truss and landed on him during a sound check. My mother, now widowed, worked to the bone at a bratwurst factory to make ends meet. She was lost to cancer in March 1987. Since I was an only child and only 18 years old, I was on my own. The wall had not come down in Germany, and it was still an economic mess. So I decided to defect to America and try and live the dream. With $1700 to my name, I arrived in New York. By trade, I was an animal trainer, thus, my dream was to be in the Circus. I purchased a monkey for $800 and began training. I had lunch with the monkey. I banged the monkey when he would not listen. I had to spank the monkey every day because he was bad. But soon after, he became talented. I became a street performer and with my monkey, was able to earn enough cash to live. From there, I was able to successfully create a professional monkey training program, and IMAGYPSY was born. Now, circuses, zoos, trainers, and pet owners have learned how to successfully spank their monkey to talent.
Here are some modalities that I will require from you in order to begin completion of the transaction.
1. Please provide a photo of yourself with a piece of paper that has IMAGYPSY printed on it. That is my company name, and thus, I will know you are genuine. Jerry, I am sorry to put you through that, but I hope you understand that we have just met, and I need assurance of my business partners. Thank you for understanding.
2. Please fax any documentation to 775-628-XXXX (or email if easier) immediately so that I can sign them as soon as possible.
After you provide the photo and paperwork, I will submit to you:
1. A copy of my State ID so you know of my genuine business intentions.
2. The applicable bank references for completion of the transaction.
3. Application to my company so you may apply for a job. That way, we can get you a working visa to come to the USA. I can assist you and your family to obtain a living space in New York, as well as set up an investment strategy for the balance.
This is a glorious day Jerry. With your help, I will be able to purchase my building and grow my business. You are like a special gift. May God bless you.
Sincerely,
The Count
JERRY KABILA
Subject: EXPECTING YOUR URGENT RESPONSES.ATTN: THE COUNT
DEAR BROTHER,
THANKS ONCE AGAIN FOR YOUR KIND HEARTED AND WELL UNDERSTOOD MAIL,AM VERY SORRY TO HEAR ABOUT THE DEATH OF YOUR FATHER AND ALSO YOUR MOTHER AT YOUR EARLY AGE IN LIFE WHEN YOU WHERE SUPPOSE TO HAVE THEIR CARE AND UP BRINGING,WELL ONLY OUR ALMIGHTY GOD KNOWS THE BEST BECAUSE HE GIVE AND HE TAKES,SURE OUR GOOD LORD WILL SURELY MAKE A WAY,WHERE THEIR SEEMS TO BE KNOW WAY FOR HIS GOOD CHILDREN THAT BELIEVE AND PUT THEIR TRUST ON HIM!.WELL I CAN SEE THAT YOU HAVE REALLY HOLD UP WITH YOURSELF TO BECOME A MAN AND WITH YOUR STATUS AND POSITION RIGHT NOW,I THINK WE COULD TOGETHER GET THIS LIFE TIME BUSINESS OPPORTUNITY FINALIZED WITHOUT MUCH FURTHER DELAYS AS AM EXPECTING THE APPROVAL OF THE NEW CHANGE OF BENEFICIARY CERTIFICATE WHICH WILL NOW HAVE TO BE IN YOUR NAME AS MY LATE FATHER'S FOREIGN BUSINESS PARTNER WHOM IS COMING TO ASSIST US IN THE FINAL CLEARANCE OF THE CONSIGNMENT FROM THE SECURITY COMPANY.
BROTHER,IN-REGARDS TO YOUR OPPION OF MY IDENTIFICATION THAT WILL SURELY BE SENT ACROSS TO YOU,PLEASE WHAT DO YOU MEAN THAT I SHOULD USE A PIECE OF PAPER THAT HAS (IMAGYPSY) PRINTED ON IT TO GET THIS INFORMATION ACROSS TO YOU,PLEASE ADVICE??.I WILL ALSO LIKE YOU TO KNOW THAT AM VERY MUCH INTERESTED IN YOUR AREA OF SPECIALIZATION AND WILL LEARN TO SPANK THE MONKEY BECAUSE I LIKE ANIMALS BUT YOU SHOULD TRY AND NOT HURT IT
WE ARE TOGETHER GOING TO GO INTO OTHER MUCH PROFITABLE AND VIABLE INVESTMENT'S AS WE ARE STILL GOING TO DISCUSS VERY WELL ON OUR INVESTMENT STRATEGY FOR SUCCESS AND I KNOW WITH THE HELP OF OUR GOOD LORD SUCCESS SHALL BE OURS AFTER THE SUCCESSFUL COMPLETION OF THIS TRANSACTION.WELL I HAVE BEEN IN THIS TOWN ACCRA GHANA IN PURSUANCE OF THE CLEARANCE OF THIS CONSIGNMENT AND I AM SO FAR ABLE TO CLARIFY/CERTIFY ALL PAPERS WITH THE SECURITY COMPANY (WHERE THE CONSIGNMENT IS BEING KEPT IN A PRIVATE SECURITY VAULT).I HAVE INSPECTED THE BOX BUT COULD NOT OPEN IT DUE TO SECURITY REASONS,BECAUSE MY LATE FATHER DID NOT DECLARE THE CONTENT AS MONEY BUT DIAMONDS / PERSONAL EFFECTS.
MY GOOD BROTHER,THIS MONEY IS NOT A SMALL AMOUNT BY ANY STANDARD,IT WAS MORE LIKE A NIGHTMARE OR AN ILLUSION WHEN THE DOCUMENTS WAS HANDED OVER TO ME IN MY COUNTRY BY MY MOTHER AND MY ARRIVAL HERE IN ACCRA-GHANA TO CONFIRM IT?S EXISTENCE IS NOTHING BUT A TESTIMONY TO THE REALIZATION OF OUR DREAM.PLEASE KNOW THAT THE LIVES OF ME AND THE REST OF MY IMMEDIATE FAMILY DEPEND SOLELY ON THIS MONEY AND WE CANNOT AFFORD TO GAMBLE,THAT IS WHY AN EXPERT LIKE YOU IS NEEDED TO LEAD US,THAT?S WHY I NEED YOUR FULL ASSURE OF HONESTY AND TRUST TOWARDS THE SUCCESSFULNESS OF THIS TRANSACTION.
THANKS IN ANTICIPATION,IT IS ALSO VERY IMPORTANT AT THIS STAGE THAT I SPEAK WITH YOU ON PHONE,AS AM EXPECTING YOUR URGENT RESPONSES AND TELEPHONE CALL, PLEASE I WILL WANT YOU TO SEND ACROSS TO ME YOUR DIRECT MOBILE TELEPHONE LINE,SO THAT I CAN AS-WELL BE GETTING ACROSS TO YOU AS WE JUST HAVE TO BE IN FULL CONTACT COMMUNICATION TOWARDS THE SUCCESSFULNESS OF THIS TRANSACTION.
TAKE VERY CARE OF YOURSELF AS AM REALLY LOOKING FORWARD TO HEARING AND SPEAKING WITH YOU ON THE TELEPHONE SO THAT WE COULD FORMALIZE THIS LIFE TIME RELATIONSHIP AND TO SPANK THE MONKEY.
MAY ALMIGHTY GOD CONTINUE BLESSING AND GUIDING YOU WITH YOUR MONKEY,YOUR BUSINESS AND EVERYONE AROUND YOU.
STAY BLESSED AND BYE FOR NOW.
WITH BEST REGARDS,
YOURS BROTHER &PARTNER,
JERRY KABILA
COUNT
Hello Jerry,Thanks for the kind words. It is not that I don't trust you, but I need to know you better and fully understand what I am getting into here. So, to prove that you are worthy and serious of this transaction, I must request a photo of you holding a sign that says IMAGYPSY. That is my company name as you recall, thus proving to me the genuine intention of your business. That way I know who I am dealing with. I am sorry to inconvenience you to do this, but if you have nothing to hide, that should not be a problem. You just need to be safe out there. I have made a lot of money and I need to protect it. We are dealing with an enormous transaction here, and I want to be rest assured of its integrity. Jerry, my parents are dead, I am not married, I have no one but myself and my monkey. Don't make me get frustrated and spank my monkey! I want to teach you the trade and that way you won't need to spank your monkey at all. This cannot and will not fail.
I can also send a copy of my ID to you as well if you would like. Please send the photo as quick as humanly possible. It would enlighten my trust. I am sorry to be paranoid. In the meantime my personal phone number is 775-628-XXXX and feel free to call me. Together by God's grace, who has brought us together, we shall not fail!
The Count
JERRY KABILA
DEAR COUNT FRIEND,HOW ARE YOU TODAY, HOPE JUST FINE? PLEASE, I AM NOT INTERESTED IN TO SPANKING A MONKEY AND SUCH. IT SEEMS THAT YOU DID NOT UNDERSTAND THE FACT OF MY MESSAGE. SO PLEASE BE INFORMED THAT THE MONEY IS PRESENTLY IN A SUSPENSE ACCOUNT OF THE NNPC WITH THE GHANA SECURITY AND AS SUCH CAN NOT BE TEMPERED WITH.
SO PLEASE ENDEAVOUR TO SEND ME THE REQUESTED DETAILS SO THAT I CAN QUICKLY LODGE IN A FORMAL APPLICATION FOR THE RELEASE AND ONWARD REMITTANCE OF THE MONEY TO YOUR ACCOUNT FOR US TO SHARE. I PLANNED TO SETTLE DOWN IN YOUR COUNTRY WHEN THE MONEY EVENTUALLY GETS TO YOUR ACCOUNT BECAUSE I WILL TRAVEL TO MEET WITH FOR THE FINAL SHARING. YOU ARE ALSO EXPECTED TO ADVISE ME ON THE BEST SECTOR OF YOUR ECONOMY TO INVEST MY OWN OF THE PROCEEDS INTO WHEN I COME OVER.
I AM PRESENTLY AWAITING YOUR IMMEDIATE RESPONSE BECAUSE TIME IS OF THE ESSENCE IN THIS DEAL.
BEST REGARDS,v JERRY KABILA
(Note: Aw, c'mon Jerry, we all know you want to spank the monkey!)
COUNT
Hi Jerry,Wow.
I ask you to provide a photo with my company name on it to prove your validity and you totally blow me off. Obviously, you are not a serious and worthy person to do business with. Are you trying to hide something? Is this some kind of game? What is the deal here? Are you trying to betray me?
You must be a criminal or complete idiot.
The Count
JERRY KABILA
Subject: I NEED YOUR URGENT REPLYDEAR COUNT,
GOOD DAY,I THANK YOU VERY MUCH FOR THE INSULT YOU GAVE ME.BY CALLING ME I CRIMINAL,SOMEONE WHOM YOU HAVE NAVER SEEN BEFORE.I WILL NOT BLAM YOU BECAUSE THE BAD ONCE IN TOWN DID NOT LET US KNOW THE GOOD ONCE.
PLEASE,I AM NOT A MAD MAN BY TALLING YOU THE PROBLEM THAT IS HOLDING ME HERE IN AFRICA.I HAVE THE MONEY JUST BECAUSE THE MONEY IS UNDER CONDITION HERE IN SECURITY COMPANY.
PLEASE,I WILL LIKE YOU TO TRY ME IN THIS,BY GIVEING ME YOUR TELEPHONE NUMBER FOR FURTHER INFORMATION,AND FAX NUMBER.
I PORMISE TO LEARN THE SPANK MONKEY WITH YOU. PLEASE WE MUST CONTINUE.
THANK .
JERRY KABILA
(I thank you for the insult? That is classic! Jerry sure has a hard time with English outside of his scamalicious templates)
[ we see it a lot & think it is irony but since we're humorless we could be wrong ]
COUNT
Subject: Must have proofJerry,
I am sorry for going off the handle. I really hate it when I forget to take my medicine. I can get to be a bear to deal with. Oh well, nothing a good 12-pack of Budweiser can't fix. Look, here is the deal. I need some proof of what you are doing. A photo, a document, something! If it has IMAGYPSY on it, the better the validity. If you are truly my brother and partner, you will show your worthiness. I urgently await your call.
The Count
JERRY KABILA
Subject: I NEED YOUR URGENT REPLYDEAR COUNT ,
HOW ARE YOU THESE FINE DAY, HOPE YOUR MONKEY IS WELL? PLEASE,I WILL LIKE YOU LOOK AT PHOTO OF THE MONEY. YOUR URGENT REPLY ARE REQUIRE AND AM LOOKING FORWARD TO YOUR ACCEPTANCE IN EARNEST. JERRY KABILA
(Note: Attached picture. Where have I seen this before? Hmm....)
[ maybe here ]
COUNT
Subject: Must have proofWow, Jerry that is an incredible stash my man. Looks like we are ready to roll. Please send the information and your picture immediately with my company name and wrap this up.
(Note: I did not have the heart to mention to him that his original email stated one trunk, unlike 2 in the photo. Hey, beggers can't be choosers!)
JERRY KABILA
Subject: EXPECTING YOUR URGENT RESPONSES.DEAR BROTHER COUNT,
THANKS FOR YOUR VERY ENCOURAGING MAIL AND THE TRUST YOU HAVE IN ME,AM VERY SORRY FOR THE DELAY IN GETTING ACROSS TO YOU AS I GOT YOUR BRIEF MESSAGE,ONLY AM DOING EVERYTHING POSSIBLE TO GET THE APPROVAL OF YOUR NAME AS THE NEW BENEFICIARY TO THE CONSIGNMENT, AS I WAS HOPING THAT THE APPROVAL SHOULD HAVE BEEN OUT BY NOW,SO THAT I COULD SEND IT ALONG WITH THE OTHER RELEVANT DOCUMENTATIONS COVERING THIS TRANSACTION,SO THAT YOU CAN AS-WELL GO THROUGH THEM AND KEEP FOR YOUR PERUSAL AS YOU ARE ONLY GOING TO SIGN AND SEND BACK TO ME,THE THEN APPROVED NEW CHANGE OF BENEFICIARY CERTIFICATE,SO THAT THE LAWYER COULD GET THE AFFIDAVIT OF THE CERTIFICATE NOTARIZED AT THE HIGH COURT OF JUSTICE HERE IN ACCRA GHANA,AS THAT WILL THEN FULLY LEGALIZE YOUR NAME AS THE NEW BENEFICIARY TO THE CONSIGNMENT.I ALSO INTEND TO SEND ALONG MY IDENTIFICATION PICTURE TO YOU BY THEN BUT WHAT DO YOU MEAN THAT I SHOULD BE HOLDING THE SIGN THAT SAYING (IMAGYPSY) OR DO YOU MEAN I SHOULD TAKE A PICTURE BY WRITING OUT THAT SIGN IN A PAPER AND TAKE THE PICTURE WITH IT? PLEASE ADVICE!
BROTHER,PLEASE I REALLY WANT YOU TO KNOW OF MY SERIOUSNESS IN THIS TRANSACTION AS YOU ARE NOT IN ANY WAY INCONVENIENCING ME WITH YOUR WORDS AND QUESTIONS BECAUSE ONE HAVE TO BE VERY SURE OF WHATEVER ONE IS DOING IN THIS LIFE AND TO BE VERY HONEST WITH YOU I AM QUIT GRATEFUL AND APPRECIATIVE OF HAVING SOMEONE LIKE YOU TO LISTEN AND EVEN PARTICIPATE IN A TRANSACTION OF THIS VOLUME COUPLED WITH THE FACT THAT WE HAVE NOT EVEN MEET OR KNOWN EACH OTHER YET BUT OUR GOOD LORD WILL SURELY MAKE A WAY FOR US AND WITH TOGETHERNESS,WE WILL SUCCESSFULLY GET THIS TRANSACTION THROUGH AND LOOK AHEAD OF OUR FUTURE INVESTMENT PLANS TOGETHER WITH YOUR IDEAS AND EXPOSURES,I KNOW WE WILL HAVE A VERY GOOD AND VIABLE INVESTMENTS TOGETHER,ALL WE REALLY NEED NOW IS NOTHING BUT;
1,TO BE PERSUASIVE,WE MUST HAVE TO BE BELIEVABLE.
2,TO BE BELIEVABLE,WE MUST BE CREDIBLE.
3,TO BE CREDIBLE,WE MUST KNOWLEDGEABLE.
BROTHER,I HAVE REALLY TAKEN TIME OUT TO READ THROUGH ALL YOUR CORRESPONDENCE WITH ME AGAIN AND AGAIN,I CAN SEE HOW FAR YOU HAVE REALLY COME UP WITH LIFE WITH HARDNESS AND STRUGGLES BUT I THINK OUR ALMIGHTY GOD IS REALLY WITH YOU AND AM VERY HAPPY IN HAVING SOMEONE LIKE YOU TO ASSIST ME AND MY IMMEDIATE FAMILY IN GETTING THIS ONLY IN-INHERITANCE THROUGH,SO THAT WE COULD ONCE AGAIN START UP WITH OUR LIVES,AS THINGS HAS BEEN VERY DIFFICULT SINCE THE DEATH OF MY LATE FATHER,SO I REALLY NEED YOUR MORAL SUPPORTS TOWARDS THE SUCCESSFULNESS OF THIS TRANSACTION AS AM LOOKING FORWARD IN MEETING WITH YOU SOONEST,SO THAT WE COULD TOGETHER GET THIS TRANSACTION THROUGH WITHOUT FURTHER DELAYS,AS I ALSO HOPE TO LEARN MORE ABOUT THE MONKEY TRADE BECAUSE AM REALLY IN-LOVE WITH ANIMALS, I WILL LOVE THE MONKEY THAN SPANK THE MONKEY MY FRIEND.
YOU CAN AS-WELL SEND ACROSS TO ME YOU?RE YOUR PICTURE,SO THAT I CAN SEE HOW YOU LOOK,AS AM GOING TO TAKE A NEW PICTURE THIS WEEKEND AS YOU HAVE REQUESTED AND SEND IT ACROSS TO YOU SOONEST AS QUICKLY AS HUMANLY POSSIBLE,SO PLEASE BEAR WITH ME!.
THANKS IN ANTICIPATION AS AM EXPECTING YOUR URGENT RESPONSES,I WILL BE GOING BACK TO THE SECURITY COMPANY THIS AFTERNOON TO FIND OUT THE UP-DATED INFORMATION REGARDING THE APPROVAL OF THE NEW CHANGE OF BENEFICIARY CERTIFICATE WHICH WILL HAVE TO NOW BE IN YOUR NAME,PLEASE YOU SHOULD LOOK FORWARD TO MY TELEPHONE CALL LATER TODAY AS WE REALLY NEED TO HAVE SOME PERSONAL AND VITAL DISCUSSION TOGETHER.
MAY ALMIGHTY GOD CONTINUE BLESSING AND GUIDING YOU AND YOUR BUSINESS AS AM REALLY LOOKING FORWARD OF SEEING YOU VERY SOON.
TAKE VERY GOOD CARE OF YOURSELF AND STAY BLESSED. PLEASE TRY AND NOT SPANK YOUR MONKEY.
THANKS AND BYE FOR NOW.
WITH BEST REGARDS,
YOURS TRULY.
JERRY KABILA.
TEL:00233-24-628698.
:00233-24-667276.
(Note: Thanks for the words of wisdom, Jerry!)
COUNT
Jerry,All I would request from you is to write my company name IMAGYPSY on a piece of paper. Then, you hold it, and someone takes a picture. That way I can confirm who I am dealing with and that this is not a joke. I can tell from your email that you are in the process of doing that, and I appreciate your understanding and efforts. Please take as much time as needed for the picture. For that I thank you dearly. I, in turn, am going to scan a photo of myself and my monkey tonight and send it as soon as possible to prove that I am for real as well. I think a glorious day is near. In the meantime, my friend and trusted associate from Ireland is coming to the US for other business matters, as he is an international lawyer. His name is Holden MeGroin and he can help me with the necessary paperwork. Don't worry, I have not told him about our business. It is secret. I look forward to your photo and I will send mine ASAP.
Thank You.
JERRY KABILA
DEAR BROTHER OF COUNT,THANKS FOR YOUR URGENT RESPONSES AS I CAN NOW UNDERSTAND YOU REGARDING MY TAKEN THE PICTURE WITH THE SIGN OF YOUR COMPANIES SIGN,WELL AM GOING TO DO ACCORDING TO YOUR WILL AND MAKE SURE THAT I TAKE THE PICTURE THIS WEEKEND AS AM ALSO EXPECTING YOURS AS PROMISED.
BROTHER,I TRIED CALLING YOU YESTERDAY ON THIS TELEPHONE NUMBER:+1-775-628-2733,WHICH YOU HAVE EARLIER SENT ACROSS TO ME, BUT THE LINE WAS RINGING INTO FAX ANDYOU TOLD ME IN YOUR MAIL THAT IT IS YOUR DIRECT TELEPHONE LINE,PLEASE SENDACROSS TO ME YOUR DIRECT MOBILE TELEPHONE LINE SO THAT WE COULD TOGETHER HAVE SOME VERY VITAL DISCUSSIONS IN-REGARDS OF THE SUCCESSFULNESS OF THIS TRANSACTION PLEASE,YOU SHOULD MAKE SURE THAT YOU KEEP EVERYTHING ABOUT THIS TRANSACTION VERY CONFIDENTIAL FOR OUR SUCCESS.
THANKS IN ANTICIPATION AS AM EXPECTING YOUR RESPONSES AND ALSO YOUR DIRECT MOBILE TELEPHONE NUMBER VERY IMPORTANT.
TAKE VERY GOOD CARE OF YOURSELF AS AM LOOKING FORWARD TO HEARING FROM YOU SOONEST
STAY BLESSED AND BYE FOR NOW.
WITH BEST REGARDS,
JERRY.
COUNT
Dear Jerry,Attached is my picture and my monkey.
I am sorry about the fax being plugged in. That was a mistake in my office. I told them to unplug the fax. Feel free to try again.
Again, I am sorry.
Best Regards.
RW
(Note: Photo is of a hit TV show from the 70's on NBC called BJ and the Bear, thus the inspiration of my story)
JERRY KABILA
Subject: WISHING YOU A VERY NICE AND HAPPY WEEKEND,JERRY.ATTN:MR. COUNT
DEAR BROTHER,
HOW ARE YOU, HOPE YOU ARE HAVING A VERY NICE WEEKEND,I TRIED CALLING YOUAGAIN YESTERDAY,BUT YOUR TELEPHONE LINE WAS STILL RINGING INTO THE FAX, WHY DON?T YOU WANT TO GIVE ME YOUR DIRECT MOBILE TELEPHONE LINE OR YOU CAN AS-WELL CALL ME SO THAT WE COULD SPEAK AS FUTURE BUSINESS PARTNERS.
BROTHER,I GOT YOUR PICTURE AND THAT OF YOUR MONKEY,YOU ARE A VERY HANDSOME MAN AND YOUR MONKEY AS-WELL,I WILL ALSO LIKE TO LET YOU KNOW THAT I HAVE TAKEN THE PICTURE AND WAS TOLD TO COME BACK FOR IT AT THE PHOTO STUDIO ON MONDAY,AS SOON AS I COLLECT THE PICTURE I WILL IMMEDIATELY SCAN IT ACROSS TO YOU.I WILL ALSO LIKE TO INFORM YOU THAT I WAS AT THE SECURITY COMPANY YESTERDAY TO FIND OUT IF THE APPROVAL FOR THE CHANGE OF BENEFICIARY CERTIFICATE WHICH I WILL HAVE TO NOW BE IN YOUR NAME IS OUT, BUT WAS TOLD BY THE DIRECTOR OF OPERATION OF THE SECURITY COMPANY THAT THE APPROVAL WILL BE READY ON MONDAY, BY THEN WE WILL REALLY KNOW THAT WE HAVE STARTED WITH THIS BUSINESS FULLY TOGETHER.
THANKS IN ANTICIPATION,AS I WILL BE EXPECTING YOUR URGENT RESPONSES AS AM ALSO LOOKING FORWARD TO YOU TELEPHONE CALL AND YOUR DIRECT MOBILE TELEPHONELINE.
MAY ALMIGHTY GOD CONTINUE BLESSING AND GUIDING YOU,YOUR MONKEY AND ALSO YOUR BUSINESS.
STAY BLESSED AND BYE FOR NOW.
WITH BEST REGARDS,
YOURS TRULY,
JERRY KABILA.
TEL:00233-24-628698.
JERRY KABILA
Subject: EXPECTING YOUR URGENT RESPONSES,THANKS.ATTN:MR.THE COUNT AND MONKEY
DEAR BROTHER,
HOW ARE YOU,YOUR BUSINESS AND ALSO YOUR MONKEY,HOPE FINE!. WELL IT?S MYGREAT PLEASURE TO INFORM YOU THAT WE HAVE FINALLY GOTTEN THE APPROVAL OF YOUR NAME AS THE BENEFICIARY TO THE CONSIGNMENT AND AM GOING TO SEND THE APPROVED CERTIFICATE ACROSS TO YOU ALONG WITH THE PICTURE AS I HAVE BEEN AT THE SECURITY COMPANY THIS BECAUSE OF THE APPROVED BENEFICIARY CERTIFICATE,SO I WILL LATER THIS EVENING COLLECT THE PICTURE WHICH I TOOK OVER THE WEEKEND SO THAT I COULD SEND IT TOGETHER WITH THE ALREADY APPROVED NEW CHANGE OF BENEFICIARY CERTIFICATE SO THAT YOU COULD SIGN IT AND SEND IT BACK TO ME IMMEDIATELY FOR THE LAWYER TO GET THE AFFIDAVIT DONE ON YOUR BEHALF AS THAT WILL FULLY LEGALIZE YOUR NAME AS THE NEW BENEFICIARY TO THE CONSIGNMENT.
BROTHER,PLEASE KNOW THAT ALL WE NEED RIGHT NOW IS NOTHING BUT UNDERSTANDING AND TRUST SO THAT WE COULD TOGETHER SUCCESSFULLY GET THROUGH WITH THIS TRANSACTION WITHOUT MUCH FURTHER DELAYS, PLEASE INFORM OF YOUR MOVEMENT SCHEDULES BECAUSE THAT IS VERY MUCH IMPORTANT RIGHT NOW AS WE JUST HAVE TO FACILITATE EVERYTHING ABOUT THE CLEARANCE OF THE CONSIGNMENT FROM THE SECURITY COMPANY AS WE HAVE ALREADY FINALIZED ARRANGEMENT WITH THE BANKERS FOR THE TRANSFERRING OF THE FUNDS AS SOON AS IT?S BEEN CLEARED FROM THE SECURITY COMPANY.I WILL ALSO LIKE YOU TO KNOW THAT WITH THE ARRANGEMENTS ALREADY IN PLACE WITH THE BANKERS,WE ARE GOING TO OPEN SOME DOMICILIARY BANK ACCOUNT IN YOUR NAME ON YOUR ARRIVAL HERE IN GHANA WHICH WE INTEND TO USE FOR THE TRANSFERRING OF THE FUNDS BIT BY BIT TO YOUR NOMINATED FOREIGN BANK ACCOUNT WHICH YOU ARE GOING TO PROVIDE ON YOUR ARRIVAL AND A MEETING WILL FIRSTLY BE ARRANGED WITH THE BANKERS ON YOUR ARRIVAL,SO THAT WE CAN BOTH HAVE A HEART TO HEART DISCUSSION WITH THEM SO THAT YOU COULD AS-WELL KNOW ALL THE PROCEDURES TOWARDS THE TRANSFERRING OF THE FUNDS AFTER THE SUCCESSFUL CLEARANCE OF THE CONSIGNMENT FROM THE SECURITY COMPANY ON YOUR ARRIVAL,HOPE YOU COULD UNDERSTAND ME?.
BROTHER,I TRIED AGAIN CALLING YOU,STILL YOUR TELEPHONE LINE WAS STILL ON FAX LINE,IT?S THEIR ANY PROBLEM OF YOUR SENDING ACROSS TO ME YOUR DIRECT MOBILE TELEPHONE LINE,SO THAT WE COULD HAVE SOME MORE IMPORTANT AND VITAL DISCUSSION TOWARDS THE SUCCESSFULNESS OF THIS TRANSACTION.
TAKE VERY GOOD CARE OF YOURSELF AND STAY BLESSED. GIVE MUCH LOVE TO THE MONKEY.
WITH BEST REGARDS,
YOURS TRULY,
JERRY KABILA.
TEL:00233-24-628698.
(Note: Give love to the monkey? Whew is it getting warm in here or is it me?)
COUNT
Jerry,How are you? Thanks for the email and update. It is obvious that you are well organized and extremely professional in your work. We shall make excellent partners.
I want to again apologize for the fax machine blocking my phone line. My friend and trusted associate Holden MeGroin forgot to unplug the machine. I hit the town this weekend anyway in anticipation of this pay day, so you would have just got voice mail. Again, many apologies. I tried to call your number but I got a message that said my call could not be completed as dialed. I must have screwed up something. Anyway, my cell phone is 212-211-8973. I have a couple of performances today with the monkey, so if you get voice mail, that is why.
I did not understand that I needed to come to Ghana. But, if that is what needed, so be it. I got plenty of cash from my show to cover the cost. Speaking of cash, I realize that you are making quite a sacrifice including me in on this deal. It makes me feel a bit guilty. I would like to get you something when I come. Perhaps a Gucci or Rolex watch would suffice? It is the least that I can do. Please advise.
Finally, let me know the time frame that you need me there, and I will check with British Airways for availability. I must admit that I am a bit nervous about traveling to Ghana. Will you be able to provide some kind of security for us? This is a lot of money, and I want us to be safe. Let me know.
I eagerly await your photo, and will try and call you later, but my assumption is that it is pretty late where you are because of the time difference.
I can't wait to complete this deal.
The Count
(Note: The prefix 211 is invalid with New York City area code 212 resulting in "you call cannot be completed as dialed" of course)
JERRY KABILA
Subject: EXPECTING YOUR URGENT RESPONSES AND TELEPHONE CALL,THANKS.ATTN:MR.THE COUNT.
DEAR SIR,
THANKS ONCE AGAIN FOR YOUR KIND HEARTED MAIL WHICH REALLY MAKES ME TO KNOW THAT WE ARE IN A VERY GOOD HAND TOWARDS THE SUCCESSFULNESS OF THIS TRANSACTION,I KNOW BY THE MIGHTY GRACE OF OUR GOOD LORD WILL BE SUCCESSFULLY OKAY SOONEST,WELL IT?S MY GREAT PLEASURE TO INFORM YOU THAT WE HAVE FINALLY GOTTEN THE APPROVAL OF YOUR NAME AS THE NEW BENEFICIARY TO THE CONSIGNMENT AND I HAVE ALSO GOTTEN PICTURE THIS EVENING,SO AM GOING TO SEND THEM ACROSS TO YOU BY TOMORROW MORNING,SO THAT YOU CAN SEND YOUR PORTION IN THE APPROVED NEW BENEFICIARY AND SEND IT BACK TO ME IMMEDIATELY IN-ORDER FOR THE LAWYER TO GET THE AFFIDAVIT NOTARIZED AT THE HIGH COURT OF JUSTICE HERE IN GHANA ON YOUR BEHALF, AS THAT WILL FULLY LEGALIZE YOUR NAME AS THE NEW BENEFICIARY TO THE CONSIGNMENT BEFORE WE COULD SUBMIT IT BACK TO THEM AT THE SECURITY COMPANY WITH THE ORIGINAL?S OF THE OTHER DOCUMENTS COVERING THIS TRANSACTION,SO THAT THE SECURITY COMPANY COULD IMMEDIATELY START UP WITH ALL THE PROCESSES TOWARDS THE CLEARANCE OF THE CONSIGNMENT ON YOUR ARRIVAL AS I WANT TO MAKE SURE THAT THIS TRANSACTION DON?T TAKE US MORE THAN 3 TO 5 WORKING DAYS TO RAP-UP, AS EVERY ARRANGEMENT HAS ALREADY BEEN CONCLUDED WITH THEM AT THE BANK WHERE WE INTEND TO OPEN SOME DOMICILIARY BANK ACCOUNTS IN YOUR NAME FOR THE TRANSFER WHICH WILL BE MADE BIT BY BIT TO YOUR FOREIGN NOMINATED AND VERY SAFE BANK ACCOUNT WHICH YOU ARE GOING PROVIDE TO THEM AT THE BANK ON YOUR ARRIVAL.
SO,I WANT YOU TO KNOW THAT AS FOR YOUR SECURITY HERE IN GHANA,I CAN ASSURE YOU THERE IS NO PROBLEM AT ALL BECAUSE TAKING OF THIS COUNTRY GHANA,THEY HAVE ONE OF THE BEST HOSPITALITY FOR VISITOR?S HERE IN AFRICA, AS MANY FOREIGNERS COMES HERE FOR TOURISM BECAUSE GHANA HAVE ONE OF THE BEST TOURIST ATTRACTION CENTER?S HERE IN AFRICA, WELL WITH GRACE OUR GOOD LORD HAS ALREADY GIVEN US, YOU WILL NEVER REGRET YOUR INVOLVEMENT IN THIS TRANSACTION AS YOU STAND TO AGAIN SO MUCH AND ADD TO YOUR ALREADY ARCHIVED AIM IN THIS LIFE. PLEASE,KNOW THAT SINCE GOD HAS BRINGS US TOGETHER,HE WILL SURELY BRING US THROUGH BECAUSE IN EVERY HAPPY MOMENTS,WE JUST HAVE TO PRAISE GOD, IN DIFFICULT MOMENTS,WE HAVE TO SEEK GOD, IN QUIET MOMENTS,WE HAVE TO WORSHIP GOD, IN PAINFUL MOMENTS,WE HAVE TO TRUST GOD AND IN EVERY MOMENT,WE HAVE TO CONTINUE THANKING GOD FOR THE GRACE AND LOVE IN OUR LIFE'S.
PLEASE YOU JUST HAVE TO FACILITATE YOUR TRAVEL DOCUMENT?S,SO THAT WE WILLNOT CONTINUE INCURRING MORE OUTSTANDING DEMURRAGE BECAUSE THE INITIAL AMOUNT MY LATE FATHER PAID WHEN HE FIRSTLY DEPOSITED THE CONSIGNMENT WITH THEM AT THE SECURITY COMPANY LAPPED IN DECEMBER 2002 AND MY MOTHER IS MAKING ALL EFFORTS TO SETTLE THE ADDITIONAL OUTSTANDING DEMURRAGE BEFORE YOUR ARRIVAL, AS IT HAS ALREADY BEEN INDICATED IN THE SECURITY COMPANIES TERMS OF CONTACT AGREEMENT WHICH MY LATE FATHER MADE WITH THEM THAT ALL OUTSTANDING DEMURRAGE HAS TO BE SETTLED FOR THE FINAL CLEARANCE OF THE CONSIGNMENT WITH A (2 DAYS) LETTER OF NOTIFICATION THAT WE ARE COMING FOR THE FINAL CLEARANCE OF OUR CONSIGNMENT,I SO MUCH APPRECIATE YOUR KIND GIFT ITEM WHICH YOU PROMISE TO BRING FOR ME WHEN COMING OVER TO GHANA,
MAY ALMIGHTY GOD BLESS YOU FOR THAT AS I WANT TO RE-ASSURE YOU THAT WITH THE HELP OF OUR GOOD LORD SUCCESS SHALL BE OURS AND WE ARE BY HIS GRACE GOING TO BE TOGETHER IN ALL OUR FUTURE PLANS OVER THEIR IN AMERICA AND I KNOW THE SKY WILL SURELY BE THE LIMIT FOR BOTH YOU,ME AND MY IMMEDIATE FAMILY MEMBER?S AS WE ALL INTEND TO LATER FINALLY SETTLE DOWN OVER THEIR IN AMERICA.
THANKS AS AM LOOKING FORWARD TO HEARING FROM YOU,PLEASE YOU SHOULD BE EXPECTING THE PICTURE AND THE DOCUMENT WHICH YOU WILL HAVE TO SIGN AND SEND BACK TO ME IMMEDIATELY,SO THAT WE COULD PROCEED WITH ALL THE DOCUMENTATIONS BEFORE YOUR ARRIVAL.
HOW WAS THE SHOW YESTERDAY WITH OUR GOOD MONKEY,HOPE IT WAS NICE?
TAKE VERY GOOD CARE OF YOURSELF AS AM REALLY LOOKING FORWARD TO SEEING YOU VERY SOON.
STAY BLESSED AND BYE FOR NOW.
WITH BEST REGARDS,
YOURS TRULY,
JERRY KABILA.
TEL:00233-24-628698.
NB:SIR,I TRIED CALLING AGAIN TO YOUR MOBILE TELEPHONE LINE:001-212 211 8973,BUTWAS TOLD THAT THE NUMBER YOU ARE CALLING IS NOT CORRECT,THAT I SHOULD CHECKAND TRY AGAIN,PLEASE TRY AND CALL ME TONIGHT IT'S VERY IMPORTANT,THANKS.
COUNT
Jerry,This is a tentative flight booking to Accra, British Airways flight BA0081 arriving September 30 at 8:25pm. That is the quickest available. I also had to arrange so that my monkey can be cared for during my trip. Once I have your picture and confirmation that the date is sufficient, I will book it. Am I safe to assume that you will handle the transportation in Ghana?
My cell phone works fine, perhaps you are dialing internationally incorrect? I called your number but no there was no answer, you probably were sleeping.
You have promised the picture and documentation now for quite some time, and I getting a little upset for lack of your results. I have done my part perfectly. What is the deal? If you are serious and want to close this out, you need to get the photo to me IMMEDIATELY. I need assurance of who you are.
Depart
Arrive 23:00
11:00 29 Sep
30 Sep JFK
LHR BA0182 British Airways Traveller
Depart
Arrive 14:35
20:25 30 Sep
30 Sep LHR
ACC BA0081 British Airways Traveller
Depart
Arrive 22:35
06:35 1 Oct
2 Oct ACC
LHR BA0078 British Airways Traveller
Depart
Arrive 08:45
11:25 2 Oct
2 Oct LHR
JFK BA0117 British Airways Traveller
JERRY KABILA
Subject: EXPECTING YOUR URGENT RESPONSES ANDTELEPHONE CALL,THANKS.ATTN:MR.THE COUNT AND YOUR MONKEY
DEAR BROTHER,
HOW ARE YOU, HOPE FINE! IF SO GLORY BE UNTO OUR ALMIGHTY GOD.AM VERY SORRY FOR THE DELAYS IN SENDING THE PICTURE AND THE DOCUMENT ACROSS TO YOU AS THE SERVER AT THE INTERNET CAFE WAS DOWN ALL THROUGH DAY, THAT?S WHY I WAS NOT ABLE TO SEND THE MESSAGE ACROSS SINCE.WELL IT?S MY GREAT PLEASURE TO INFORM YOU THAT WE HAVE FINALLY SENT THE APPROVED NEW BENEFICIARY DOCUMENT, THE PICTURE AND THE AGREEMENT WHICH MY LAWYER HAS PREPARED ACROSS TO YOU THROUGH SCANNING, SO YOU WILL NEED TO PRINT OUT THE NEW BENEFICIARY DOCUMENT, AS AM ALSO SENDING ACROSS TO YOU THE MEMO RANDOM OF AGREEMENT AS YOU WILL NEED TO SIGN THE AGREEMENT ALONG WITH THE APPROVED NEW BENEFICIARY AND SENDBACK TO ME IMMEDIATELY, IN-ORDER FOR THE LAWYER TO GET THE AFFIDAVIT OF THE APPROVED NEW BENEFICIARY NOTARIZED AT THE HIGH COURT OF JUSTICE HERE IN GHANA ON YOUR BEHALF BEFORE YOUR ARRIVAL AS THAT WILL FULLY LEGALIZEYOUR NAME AS THE NEW BENEFICIARY TO THE CONSIGNMENT, THEN WE COULD SUBMIT THE THEN NOTARIZED AND SIGNED NEW BENEFICIARY DOCUMENT BACK TO THEM AT THE SECURITY COMPANY WITH THE ORIGINAL?S OF THE OTHER DOCUMENTS COVERING THIS TRANSACTION, SO THAT THE SECURITY COMPANY COULD IMMEDIATELY START UP WITH ALL THE PROCESSES TOWARDS THE CLEARANCE OF THE CONSIGNMENT BEFORE YOUR ARRIVAL AS I WANT TO MAKE SURE THAT THIS TRANSACTION DON?T TAKE US MORE THAN AT LEAST 3 WORKING DAYS TO RAP-UP ON YOUR ARRIVAL, AS EVERY ARRANGEMENT HAS ALREADY BEEN CONCLUDED WITH THEM AT THE BANK WHERE WE INTEND TO OPEN SOME DOMICILIARY BANK ACCOUNTS IN YOUR NAME FOR THE TRANSFERRING OF THE FUNDS AFTER THE FINAL CLEARANCE OF THE CONSIGNMENT AND THE TRANSFER WILL HAVE TO BE MADE BIT BY BIT INTO YOUR NOMINATED AND VERY SAFE FOREIGN BANK ACCOUNT WHICH YOU ARE GOING PROVIDE TO THEM AT THE BANK ON YOUR ARRIVAL.WE ARE AS-WELL GOING TO MEET WITH THE BANKER?S ON YOUR ARRIVAL,SO THAT YOU WILL KNOW ALL THE PROCEDURES TOWARDS THE SUCCESSFUL TRANSFERRING OF THE FUNDS,HOPE YOU CAN UNDERSTAND ME?.
BROTHER,I SO MUCH APPRECIATE ALL YOUR ASSISTANCES, MAY ALMIGHTY GOD BLESS YOU FOR ALL YOU ARE DOING AND INTENDING TO DO FOR ME AND MY IMMEDIATE FAMILY MEMBERS AS I WILL ALSO WANT TO RE-ASSURE YOU THAT WITH THE HELP OF OUR GOOD LORD SUCCESS SHALL BE OURS AND WE ARE BY HIS GRACE GOING TO BE TOGETHER IN ALL OUR FUTURE INVESTMENT PLANS IN AMERICA AND BY THE GRACE OF GOD,I KNOW THE SKY WILL SURELY BE THE LIMIT FOR BOTH YOU,ME AND MY IMMEDIATE FAMILY MEMBERS,AS WE ALL INTEND TO LATER FINALLY SETTLE DOWN OVER THEIR IN AMERICA.
PLEASE, KNOW THAT SINCE GOD HAS BRINGS US TOGETHER, HE WILL SURELY BRING US THROUGH BECAUSE IN EVERY HAPPY MOMENTS, WE JUST HAVE TO PRAISE GOD, IN DIFFICULT MOMENTS, WE HAVE TO SEEK GOD, IN QUIET MOMENTS, WE HAVE TO WORSHIP GOD, IN PAINFUL MOMENTS, WE HAVE TO TRUST GOD AND IN EVERY MOMENT, WE HAVE TO CONTINUE THANKING GOD FOR THE GRACE AND LOVE IN OUR LIFE'S.
THANKS IN ANTICIPATION AS AM EXPECTING YOUR URGENT RESPONSES IF YOU HAVE RECEIVED THE DOCUMENTS LOOKING FORWARD TO HEARING FROM YOU, PLEASE YOU SHOULD SIGN THE DOCUMENTS AND SEND BACK TO ME IMMEDIATELY, SO THAT THE LAWYER COULD PROCEED WITH ALL THE DOCUMENTATIONS BEFORE YOUR ARRIVAL AS I AM ALSO EXPECTING YOUR TELEPHONE AND WILL ALSO TRY TO CALL THROUGH YOUR MOBILE TELEPHONE LINE LATER TODAY BROTHER, PLEASE I WILL ADVICE THAT YOU DON?T COME WITH YOUR MONKEY AS IT WILL BE VERY EASY FOR YOU OVER THEIR, BUT IT MEAN?T BE DIFFERENT HERE, SO THAT THE AUTHORITY HERE WILL NOT BE SUSPECTING YOU OF DRUG PEDDLING AS WE JUST HAVE VERY LITTLE TIME TO GET THIS TRANSACTION THROUGH ON YOUR ARRIVAL.
TAKE VERY GOOD CARE OF YOURSELF AS AM REALLY LOOKING FORWARD TO SEEING YOU VERY SOON.
MAY ALMIGHTY GOD CONTINUES BLESSING AND GUIDING YOU, YOU?RE MONKEY AND ALSO YOU?RE BUSINESS.
STAY BLESSED AND BYE FOR NOW.
WITH BEST REGARDS,
YOURS TRULY,
JERRY KABILA.
NB:SIR-PLEASE ACKNOWLEDGE IF YOU HAVE RECEIVED THE (2 PAGES) FAX AS YOU WILL HAVE TO IMMEDIATELY SIGN THEM AND SEND BACK TO ME, THANKS.
(Note: Jerry admitting that the internet cafe was down proves again how incredibly stupid he really is so I had to exploit it. Sometimes, the Lads make my material too damn easy. Also, I really need to call him, but I will make sure it is the wrong number.)
COUNT
Jerry,I just called your number 00233-24-628697 and it said that it was disconnected? What is that about?
Meanwhile, all I get from you is longer and longer messages of our brotherhood and about God bringing us together and more crap like that.
I don't want to hear that anymore. I want the fax, I want the picture. This is really starting to make me wonder. Why on earth are you at an internet cafe? You are some kind of freakin Prince or something, and you have to use a cafe? This is just way too suspicious my "brother". I don't have a good feeling about this whole thing.
I need action fast or forget it.
SEND THE PICTURE! SEND THE FAX!!
JERRY KABILA
Subject: BROTHER,PLEASE CONFIRM IF YOU GOT THE ATTACHMENTS (2 PAGES) DOCUMENTS & PICTUREBROTHER,
PLEASE COMFIRM IF YOU HAVE GOTTEN THE (2 PAGES0 DOCUMENTS AND THE PICTURE AS AM EXPECTING YOUR URGENT RESPONSES AND TELEPHONE CALL.
THANKS.
YOURS,
JERRY.
(Pay-dirt!! Thanks Jerry for telling the world I'M A GYPSY!)
COUNT
Jerry,I got the picture. You obviously are a man a great integrity and honesty. I appreciate your efforts and you have proven your worthiness. We are now partners for life. I am sorry that I was so upset. There are so many unworthy people in this world, and I just want to be careful.
On behalf of IMAGYPSY, Inc, I would like to welcome you to our business. I am going to hire you as a consultant to the African market, effective today. That way, it will be easier for you to come to New York after my trip to Ghana.
I purchased a gold Rolex watch last night. It cost $15,754 and it will be just a small token of our appreciation for everything that you have done, to make our dreams come true. I am going to wear it when I arrive. Am I safe to assume that when I come through customs, there won't be a problem with such a watch? I have my passport ready, and if there is anything else I should bring, let me know ASAP. I am uncomfortable bringing cash along, so I only intend on bringing around $5,000 USD, plus my Business Credit Card that has a $15,000 limit (for food, hotels, etc..) I believe that should be sufficient.
Can you suggest the best hotel for me to stay at? I need to make reservations.
Unfortunately, I did not get the fax. Please resend to 775-628-2732 at your convenience.
I am booking the flights today.
Jerry, outside of my monkey and business, you are all that I have. I am so glad you picked us. We will flourish together!
I just called your number 00233-24-628697 again, and it does not seem to work.
(Note: My buddy Jerry has not figured out that I listed his phone number wrong twice. Classic!)
I am going to be performing most of the day with my monkey. By the way, his name is "Bear". Therefore, I will not be available on cell. That is ok. We will have a glorious meeting in just a few days.
Your brother forever,
The Count
COUNT
Subject: urgent updateHello Jerry, my friend.
Since emailing you this morning, I have begun to think about my trip. It is really starting to sink in that we are going to get trunk loads of cash in the millions. This is not child's play right? That is just incredible.
It is not that I don't trust you Jerry, but I have a lot at stake here, my brother, including the possibility that the security company or any other knowing people may try and rob and/or harm us. Also, transferring the money to another account can be traced. We need to be careful Jerry. Therefore, I have hired a private security staff to bring with me to Ghana. Attached is a photo of my team that will meet you in Ghana. We have applied for a special diplomatic immunity to carry weapons in Ghana. So far, the US Embassy in Accra has responded positively to our request, since I offered a one-time payment of 1 million USD for their "support". Once the trunk is released, we shall take the trunk of money and immediately go to the US Embassy in Accra and make the one time payment of 1 million to the consulate. Then, travel to the port of Accra where a private cargo vessel will be ready to accept my staff, the trunk of money, and myself. My good lawyer Holden MeGroin, has a cousin who owns a cargo company based out of Copenhagen. We will travel by ship from Ghana direct to the port of Monte Carlo. From there, we will travel direct to London, where MeGroin will be able to safely deposit the funds in his corporate account under a trust fund.
From there, we will then begin the process of transferring to IMAGYPSY and you can then start the process of coming to the US. I want to warn you that because of the sensitive nature of the events of September 11, 2001, it may be difficult to get a Visa to the US. However, I can help since you are my consultant. But, one step at a time.
If you have additional ideas, let me know.
The Count
The IMAGYPSY Security Team is ready for action.
JERRY KABILA
Subject: EXPECTING YOUR URGENT RESPONSES AND TELEPHONE CALL.ATTN: MR. THE COUNT AND HIS DEAR MONKEY,
DEAR SIR,
HOW ARE YOU, HOPE FINE! WELL AM VERY SORRY THAT YOU DID NOT RECEIVE THE (2 PAGES) DOCUMENTS WHICH I SENT AS AN ATTACHMENT ALONG WITH MY PICTURE YESTERDAY, AS I GOT YOUR MAIL THIS MORNING TO KNOW THAT YOU HAVE NOT GOTTEN THE DOCUMENTS, BUT I CHECK THROUGH MY SENT FOLDER IN MY MAIL BOX AND IT SHOWS THAT ONLY THE PICTURE WENT OKAY,AM NOW GOING TO RE-SEND THE DOCUMENTS TO YOU THROUGH YOUR FAX LINE AS THAT WILL BE MUCH MORE EASIER;
1,THE NEW CHANGE OF BENEFICIARY DOCUMENTS.
2,THE MEMORANDUM OF AGREEMENT BETWEEN US.
PLEASE AS SOON AS YOU RECEIVE THIS DOCUMENT?S YOU SHOULD GO THROUGH, SIGN AND SCAN THEM BACK ME IMMEDIATELY, SO THAT THE LAWYER COULD START UP WITH THE NOTARIZATION.
AM VERY SORRY AS YOU HAVE REALLY BEEN TRYING A WRONG NUMBER, MY DIRECT TELEPHONE NUMBER IS:00233-24-628698 AND NOT 97,TO BE VERY HONEST WITH YOU, I THOUGHT YOU HAVE BEEN AVOIDING ME ON THE TELEPHONE, BECAUSE YOUR MOBILE TELEPHONE LINE YOU GAVE ME IS NOT GOING THROUGH AS THE COMPUTER WILL ALWAYS TELL ME WHEN-EVER I TRY CALLING THAT, PLEASE CHECK THE NUMBER AND TRY AGAIN, THIS REALLY PISS ME OFF BECAUSE AS SOON AS I CALL YOUR OTHER TELEPHONE LINE, IT IMMEDIATELY GOES THROUGH INTO THE FAX LINE AND YOU SAID YOU TRIED CALLING ME AND YOU WHERE TOLD THAT MY PHONE WAS DISCONNECTED, THAT?S VERY SURPRISING TO ME AS MY TELEPHONE LINE IS QUITE WORKING PERFECTLY,SO YOU CAN CALL ME NOW.
PLEASE I DEEM IT VERY IMPORTANT THAT YOU PLACE A CALL ACROSS TO THEM AT THE SECURITY, SO THAT YOU CAN FORMULARIZE YOURSELF TO THEM AS ALL YOUR DETAILED INFORMATION IS ALREADY WITH THEM AT THE SECURITY COMPANY, IT?S VERY IMPORTANT FOR THEM TO KNOW AND UNDERSTAND THAT YOUR ARE THE BUSINESS PARTNER OF MY LATE FATHER WHOM IS COMING ALONG WITH ME (JERRY KABILA) FOR THE FINAL CLEARANCE OF YOUR CONSIGNMENT ON YOUR ARRIVAL, AM LOOKING FORWARD TO HEARING FROM YOU AND ALSO SEEING YOU SOONEST, HOPE YOU HAVE ALREADY GOTTEN YOUR TRAVELING VISA TO GHANA, PLEASE ADVICE?,
THANKS IN ANTICIPATION AS I WILL LIKE YOU TO KNOW THAT AM NOT FREAK IN PRINCE BUT A PERSON WITH THE FEAR OF OUR GOOD LORD. WELL AM EXPECTING YOUR URGENT RESPONSES IF YOU HAVE NOW GOTTEN THE PICTURE AND THE (2) DOCUMENTS WHICH I HAVE FAXED TO YOU.
TAKE VERY GOOD CARE OF YOURSELF AS AM LOOKING FORWARD TO SEEING YOU SOON.
STAY BLESSED WITH YOUR MONKEY AND BYE FOR NOW.
WITH BEST REGARDS,
YOURS TRULY,
JERRY KABILA.
TEL:00233-24-628698.
(Note: Other documents did not come through, he must not have got to the security email yet, but then he responded back immediately and obviously read it. By the way, sure Jerry, let me get my check book and cover that $1880 --or is it $1808 according to the wording-- "fee" right away...)
JERRY KABILA
Subject: WHAT ARE DOING?THIS SECURITY TEAM REALLY PISS ME OFF BECAUSE YOU CANNOT JUST BRING AN ARMY AND SUCH. THIS IS NOT POSSIBLE AND YOU CANNOT BRING THEM AT ALL. IT WILL NOT MAKE THE TRANSACTION POSSIBLE. THE POLICE WILL COME AFTER US. ARE YOU A MAD MAN?
YOU WILL GET US IN JAIL FOR HAVING WEPONS. BROTHER, WE WILL BE SAFE. I AM MAKING SURE OF THAT. YOU MUST CALL ME IMMEDIATELY AS YOU CANNOT LEAVE UNTIL THIS IS WORKED OUT.
ALSO, NEED TO KNOW ABOUT $1880 TRANSFER FEE.
PLEASE YOU MUST CALL ME UREGENTLY.
YOURS TRULY,
JERRY KABILA.
TEL:00233-24-628698.
(Note: Jerry has no idea what is about to hit him. Hang on, here we go!)
(it is truely geat that free web based email can let you change your name anytime to anything.)
HOLDEN MeGROIN
Subject: Tragic NewsHello Mr. Kabila,
My name is Holden MeGroin, and I am the lawyer for The Count of IMAGYPSY, Inc. I understand from my client that he was doing business with you, and I obtained your email from a file located on his desk, and through conversations with my friend and client. As a matter of fact, we were preparing a trip to Ghana to complete a transaction of some kind that my client refused to disclose to me other than an investment opportunity of a lifetime.
This afternoon, he was returning from Long Island to Manhattan with his prized pet monkey after a performance at a local school. As he attempted to enter the Brooklyn Bridge, a cement truck lost control and crashed into his vehicle. The impact of the cement truck caused fatal injuries and he was pronounced dead at the scene, This is a very sad and tragic day. I am crushed at the loss of my friend and client. His monkey "Bear" also sustained injuries and died at the scene as well.
Currently, he has no heirs, since he was single, not married, and both of his parents are dead. To attempt to locate other possible relatives in Germany would be almost impossible.
By law, I am now responsible for the assets of IMAGYPSY Inc. I plan on paying all creditors their balance due. From the emails that he printed, it appears that he may owe you approximately $1880 USD, but it is unclear to me. Perhaps you can help clear up the situation, as I sit here and shed many tears at the loss. He had enough liquid cash to cover your payment, and I want to make sure all his clients were taken care of.
Please email the modalities of your business and I can assist you in applying for any creditor holds against his estate. Again, I am sorry to break the news to you and hope you pray for our brother's soul. May he rest in peace.
Sincerely,
Holden MeGroin
JERRY KABILA
Subject: VERY SORRY FOR THE DEATH OF YOUR CLIENT AND HIS MONKEY.ATTN:MR.HOLDEN MEGROIN.
DEAR LAWYER,
HOW ARE YOU,VERY SORRY TO HEAR THE TRAGIC NEWS OF THE DEATH OF MY GOOD MR. COUNT AND HIS MONKEY,MAY THEIR SOUL REST IN PERFECT PEACE.WELL WE ARE ALL AN ADVENTURE-RA AND ONE HAVE TO DIED ONE DAY,SINCE MY FIREND AND PARTNER IS DEAD,THAT MEANS I HAVE TO LOOK FOR SOMEONE ELSE TO FINALIZE MY TRANSACTION WITH,PLEASE NOTE THAT (IMAGYPSY) IS NOT IN ANY WAY INDEBTED TO ME,SO YOU CAN GIVE ASSETS TO CHARITY ORGANIZATION WAS THAT WILL MAKE HIS SOUL ANDTHAT OF HIS MONKEY REST IN PERFECT PEACE AND IF YOU KNOW YOU HAVE ANY OTHER THING WE COULD PERSONALLY TOGETHER,PLEASE DON'T HESITATE TO GET ACROSS TO ME,IT'S BEEN A VERY GREAT OR WHAT DO YOU THING?????.
THANKS AND PLEASE TAKE VERY GOOD CARE OF YOUR CLIENTS ASSETS AND INVESMENT. IF I MAY HELP, PLEASE LET ME KNOW.
MAY YOU BE BLESSED AND GUIDED.
TAKE CARE AND BYE FOR NOW.
WITH BEST REGARDS,
YOURS LATE CLIENT'S PARTNER,
JERRY KABILA.
NB:THANKS FOR YOUR TIME AND UNDERSTANDING,BYE.
HOLDEN MeGROIN
Dear Jerry,Funeral services will be Monday. This is incredible. I can't believe he is gone. The monkey too, it is such a shame. I was looking forward to our trip to Ghana. What for, I don't know. He had a quite a security team set up, so it must have been something big.
Anyway, I have come across some funds from IMAGYPSY that he earned from his last 3 performances totalling $417,500 USD.
Technically, I should freeze his assets until the US Government can run an audit to declare who the legal owner of the business is. Obviously, I cannot do anything because of my status within the company.
In addition to the $417,500, he buried close to $2,245,000 in a building expense fund that has not hit the company's bottom line yet since I have not completed the September financial reports.
How about we become partners, Mr. Kabila? I need to hide this somewhere. Africa would be a great place, hard to trace, easy to hide. Can you hold the cash?
Can you help me out? By the way, what exactly where you two up to?
Also, if you are interested in donating to The Spank the Monkey Memorial Fund let me know. We are donating all of the money to the Monkey house at the San Diego Zoo in their honor.
Thanks for the time, sorry to bother you.
Sincerely,
Holden MeGroin
IMAGYPSY, Inc
Interum CEO
JERRY KABILA
Subject: WHAT ARE HOLDING?ATTN:MR.HOLDEN MEGROIN.
DEAR LAWYER,
WHAT DO YOU MEAN HOLD MONEY? I DO NOT UNDERSTAND.
PLEASE ADVISE DETAILS OR CALL ME.
WITH BEST REGARDS,
YOURS LATE CLIENT'S PARTNER,
JERRY KABILA.
TEL:00233-24-628698.
(Note: The Subject question, "what are holding" made me laugh for hours. I really wanted to say I was Holden MeGroin, but I got him under my trap and couldn't get too out of control...)
HOLDEN MeGROIN
Dear Jerry,If I do not move around some of the assets of IMAGYPSY soon, the Government will freeze the money, and then determine the legal heir. Since my client did not have any, it is more than likely that after all of the creditors are paid, the funds will be lost. I figure that the total sum will be approximately $5.5 million USD that I can hide without it getting traced. We have both a vested interest here, Jerry.
Like I said, Jerry, how about we become partners? I need to hide the money somewhere. I worked hard for this company, and I don't want the Government to take the Count's estate. Do it for him and the monkey. Can you help me out?
For your efforts, I can offer 20% for you, and hold 10% for costs, and 70% for me.
Please consider a possible account for transfer of funds and contact me with the information
Thanks for the time, please get back to me ASAP.
Sincerely,
Holden MeGroin
IMAGYPSY, Inc
Interum CEO
(Note: Jerry does this offer sound familiar? I guess you are really sucked in, and forget because of your new possible pay day...)
JERRY KABILA
Subject: TRANSACTIONATTN:MR.HOLDEN MEGROIN.
DEAR LAWYER,
MY DEAR COUNT AND HIS MONKEY WERE LOYAL FRIENDS OF MINE. IT WOULD HONOR ME TO HELP SECURE HIS FUNDS. I CAN PROVIDE AN ACCOUNT NUMBER FOR MY ASSOCIATE IN THE NETHERLANDS TOMMORROW. WE CAN HELP SECURE MY DEAR FRIEND?S MONEY AND WILL TAKE EXCELLENT CARE. ONCE THE THINGS ARE OVER, YOU CAN THEN CALL US FOR IMMEDIATE TRANSFER BACK TO YOU. I AM VERY GOOD AT FINANCAL DEALINGS AND WILL GUARD THE MONEY WITH MY LIFE AND SOUL.
THANKS IN ANTICIPATION AS I HOPE TO STOP SO FAR,AM LOOKING FORWARD TO YOUR URGENT RESPONSES ,AS I WILL ALSO LIKE YOU TO SEND ACROSS TO ME YOUR DIRECT MOBILE LINE,SO THAT I CAN AS-WELL GET ACROSS TO YOU AS WE REALLY NEED TO SPEAK ON THE TELPEHONE BECAUSE THAT WILL ALSO ENHANCE MORE MUTUAL TRUST AND PROPER UNDERSTANDING. PLEASE EXTEND MY SINCERE SYMPATHYS TO YOUR ENTIRE BUSINESS AND EVERYONE AROUND YOU.PLEASE IF YOU NEED ANY FURTHER CLEARIFICATION,AM AWAITING TO PROVIDE THEM TO YOU. MAY ALMIGHTY GOD CONTINUE BLESSING AND GUIDING YOU FROM OUR DEAR COUNT AND THE MONKEY.
WITH BEST REGARDS,
PLEASE CALL ME AT TEL:00233-24-628698.
(Note: I am not wasting anytime, and try to 419 my pal Jerry...)
HOLDEN MeGROIN
Dear Jerry,Thank you for considering to help save some funds from our dearly departed brother. I just returned from the funeral and am still feeling very sad. You are doing a great thing Jerry. The Count and his Monkey worked very hard to get where they did, and now we can help take care of his hard work together rather than the Government.
In order to transfer the funds, there is a service charge from the bank for $1880 USD. I cannot pay it because of my position in the company and would be accused of embezzlement. Please consider a Western Union transfer to me in New York, and I will have a third party pick it up and deliver it to the bank.
Your Friend,
Holden
JERRY KABILA
Subject: GO IN HELLDO YOU REALLY THINK THAT I AM FOOLISH? HOW CAN YOU SEND THE MONEY TO ME? I THINK THAT YOU ARE TRYING TO PLAY GAMES WITH ME. I DO NOT LIKE THIS AT ALL. I AM VERY UPSET THAT YOU CAN THINK THAT THIS IS SOME KIND OF GAME AND SUCH. I AM REALLY PISS ME OFF. I BET THAT YOU ARE LIAR AND FULL OF SHIT. THE BANK IS NOT GOING TO CHARGE YOU AND I WILL NOT SEND ANY MONEY WESTERN UNION.
IN FACT PISS OFF ON YOURSELF. IT IS CRUEL JOKE THAT YOU ARE DOING ON ME OR WHAT IT IS NOT FUNNY AT ALL. I WANT TO GET YOU AND I HOPE THAT A CEMENT TRUCK HITS YOU LIKE THE COUNT AND HIS MONKEY. YOU ARE A STUPID JACK ASS AND SHOULD GO TO HELL.
YOU ARE NOT REAL, YOU ARE SOMETHING EVIL AND TRYING TO ROB ME? YES? I WILL NOT LISTEN TO YOUR STORIES AND BELIVE ANYTING THAT YOU TELL ME FOR YOU ARE A LIKE A TOLITE FULL OF SHIT. BURN IN HELL AND LEAVE ME ALONE.
BYE FOR NOW LIAR
JERRY KABILA.
(Note: I sent a couple more "you don't understand emails", but he did not respond and obviously figured it out...so I reported his activity to the abuse folks, and they are in the process of shutting him down, to add insult to injury.)